Where does the word "nerd" come from?

“The Mass of Organic Utterances”

In my earlier days growing up within the Burri family, this phrase would have produced an effect causing all four of us boys to giggle uncontrollably as might any small faux pas or cross-eyed glance between us in a solemn church service, funeral, or wedding. To our mature minds, an ‘organic utterance’ would have manifested as a burp or fart. The incorporated ‘mass’, therefore, would have included a dash of puke or a ‘fart blossom’; forceful ejections of both gaseous and solid materials. The more erudite among us would have euphemized this as a ‘dingle-berry’ or, after a slight aging process, a ‘crispy critter’. We euphemized, Mom and Dad nearly euthanized.

In 1892, David Josiah Brewer posted an article on his blog that used the phrase in a more mature light. He concluded from his research that in American history ‘the mass of organic utterances’ indicated that...

“...this is a religious people. This is historically true. From the discovery of this continent to the present hour, there is a single voice making this affirmation.

The commission to Christopher Columbus, ... by the grace of God, ... "it is hoped that by God's assistance some of the continents and islands in the [496] ocean will be discovered,"...

The first colonial grant, that made to Sir Walter Raleigh in 1584, ... provided that "they be not against the true Christian faith...”

The first charter of Virginia,... "We, greatly commending, and graciously accepting of, their Desires for the Furtherance of so noble a Work, which may, by the Providence of Almighty God, hereafter tend to the Glory of His Divine Majesty, in propagating of Christian Religion to such People,...”

Language of similar import may be found in the subsequent charters of that colony from the same king, in 1609 and 1611; and the same is true of the various charters granted to the other colonies.

The celebrated compact made by the pilgrims in the Mayflower, 1620, recites: "Having undertaken for the Glory of God, and Advancement of the Christian Faith, and the Honour of our King and Country, a Voyage to plant the first Colony in the northern Parts of Virginia; Do by these Presents, solemnly and mutually, in the Presence of God and one another, covenant and combine ourselves together into a civil Body Politick, for our better Ordering and Preservation, and Furtherance of the Ends aforesaid."

The fundamental orders of Connecticut,... "Forasmuch as it hath pleased the Allmighty God by the wise disposition of his diuyne pruidence... a people are gathered togather the word of {515} God requires that to mayntayne the peace and union of such a people there should be an orderly and decent Gouerment established according to God,.. enter into Combination and Confederation togather, to mayntayne and presearue the liberty and purity of the gospell of our Lord Jesus wch we now prfesse, as also the disciplyne of the Churches, wch according to the truth of the said gospell is now practised amongst vs."

In the charter of privileges granted by William Penn to the province of Pennsylvania, in 1701, it is recited: "Because no People can be truly happy, though under the greatest Enjoyment of Civil Liberties, if abridged of the Freedom of their Consciences, as to their Religious Profession and Worship; And Almighty God being the only Lord of Conscience, Father of Lights and Spirits; and the Author as well as Object of all divine Knowledge, Faith, and Worship, who only doth enlighten the Minds, and persuade and convince the Understandings of People, I do hereby grant and declare,..."

Coming nearer to the present time, the declaration of independence recognizes the presence of the Divine in human affairs in these words: "We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness." "We, therefore, the Representatives of the United States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare," etc.; "And for the [143 U.S. 457, 468] support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the Protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes, and our sacred Honor."

If we examine the constitutions of the various states, we find in them a constant recognition of religious obligations. Every constitution of every one of the 44 states contains language which, either directly or by clear implication, recognizes a profound reverence for religion, and an assumption that its influence in all human affairs is essential to the well-being of the community.

Even the constitution of the United States, which is supposed to have little touch upon the private life of the individual, contains in the first amendment a declaration common to the constitutions of all the states, as follows: "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof," etc., - and also provides in article 1, § 7, (a provision common to many constitutions,) that the executive shall have 10 days (Sundays excepted) within which to determine whether he will approve or veto a bill.

There is no dissonance in these declarations. There is a universal language pervading them all, having one meaning. They affirm and reaffirm that this is a religious nation. These are not individual sayings, declarations of private persons. They are organic utterances. They speak the voice of the entire people. While because of a general recognition of this truth the question has seldom been presented to the courts, yet we find that in Updegraph v. Comm., 11 Serg. & R. 394, 400, it was decided that, "Christianity, general Christianity, is, and always has been, a part of the common law of Pennsylvania; * * * not Christianity with an established church and tithes and spiritual courts, but Christianity with liberty of conscience to all men." And in People v. Ruggles, 8 Johns. 290, 294, 295, Chancellor KENT, the great commentator on American law, speaking as chief justice of the supreme court of New York, said: "The people of this state, in common with the people of this country, profess the general doctrines of Christianity as the rule of their faith and practice;...

These and many other matters which might be noticed, add a volume of unofficial declarations to the mass of organic utterances that this is a Christian nation.”

Holy Trinity Church v. U.S., United States Supreme Court ruling, Feb. 29, 1892. Majority opinion written by Justice David Josiah Brewer.

According to the opinion of modern historians and intellectual elite, not only did the nation’s founders and authors of The Bill of Rights not know the meaning of what they had enacted, but even over 100 years later the Supreme Court still did not know what these words meant. Such revelation wasn’t given until the latter 20th Century. A true miracle!

From these circumstances I am forced to conclude that ‘the mass of organic utterances’ of today’s luminaries, the higher courts, and organizations like the ACLU has now become a modernized recycled version that matches the intellectual depth of the Burri brothers’ fart blossoms and crispy critters. It is just as funny.

We Burri boys were far ahead of the curve.

Somebody tell Mr. Pterry.

They do have street corners in Iowa, right?

Date stall man's 'life changed'

A man who set up a stall on a busy high street to advertise for a girlfriend says his faith in human nature has been restored by the experience.

Self-confessed cynic Jeremy Butler, 32, did not get a negative comment during his 18 hours on Crouch End High Street in north London at the weekend.

He says he was congratulated on his courage by members of both sexes.

Mr Butler got a whopping 93 phone numbers, and has already gone out on a date with one woman.

Turd Alert!

Picture Michael Moore inside a very large condom. (You may substitute Kennedy; Teddy or Anthony, Kerry, Pelosi, Boxer, Dean, et al. to suit your own tastes.) The condom represents the extent of Mr. Moore’s universe of his own post-modern construction. The chemical make up of the prophylactic is a product of ingenious post-modern science and ingenuity. It is intended to form a semi-permeable, reverse osmotic membranous barrier against the input of information from countless other demigods foreign to his self-constructed realm. This membrane allows for all ejaculate to be dispersed orgiastically into the outside spheres in hopes of infecting others with Human Imbecilo Virus, but metabolizes the vast majority of outside thought and logic upon entrance. Language, literature, history, law, sociology, psychology, and rationality are catabolized and anabolized into a synthetic form suitable and fitting to the universe of his (their) own creation.

These celebrated ‘intellectuals’ have become more emboldened both by their hubris and their frustration by recent defeats to more greatly show true colors. As control over the legislative and executive branches continues to wane, they will increasingly rely on the judiciary to interpret the law of the land to their specifications in attempt to reassume cultural dominance.

They will continue to put forth the straw men of ‘Bush is a Nazi-ism’, ‘theocracy’, and ‘dominionism’ to mask their own hopes for assuming rightful dominion. It should be successful in that we are too stupid to deny them their just due-due.

Dada Theater Presents:

"A Rocking Horse Must Sway Both To AND Fro or It Will just be a Trojan Horse"

Since everyone expresses interest in fairness, justice and equality, I propose legal action that would take us one step further toward the fulfillment of that worthy goal. As Mama always used to say, "What's good for the goose is good for the gander." In the U.S., justice is depicted by a woman holding a set of balances in her hand. There are no fingers adding weight to one side or the other. The woman also is blindfolded to insure that justice herself does not prejudice the evidence or lack thereof in determining the decision or make justice dependent upon the appearance, wealth, or gender of the litigants.

In conjunction with these principles, the right to privacy in the area of reproductive rights needs to be expanded. At present the woman involved has all the freedom of choice concerning her pregnancy. The father has no say as to whether the child is aborted or brought to term. My expectation is that the right to privacy's tent should be expanded to be more inclusive and not exclude even the most dispicable among our citizenry-- men. To allow the right to privacy and reproductive rights their full function to all Americans, the sperm donor should be allowed the choice of 'virtual abortion'. At the price of an abortion's average determined cost, the father could exercise his rights to abort all responsibilities of support for both mother and unborn child, as well as the 18 years of traditional responsibilities if the child is allowed to live. In this way, the Constitutional rights of privacy and reproductive choice expands to its logical place-- freedom and justice for all.

(Postscript-- I hate doing this, but as I am often accused of being obtuse in my writing and as I expect that most blog visitors are skimmers rather than readers, I want to explain a couple of things. The title and subtitle of this post contain two double entendres germane to the post. 'Dada', a baby's first word for Daddy and the chosen French word (meaning rocking horse) for a school of art trying to depict life's meaningless and absurdity. And, of course, 'Trojan' is both referring to the ancient city-state of Troy as well as the condom manufacturer. Since there is so much on the blogosphere to read, I often superficially skim as well, but I would ask readers of this blog to suspect that my obtuseness is most often purposeful and meaningful to the intended subject. Since my highest levels of educational completion are a high school diploma and instruction as a nurse's aide, meaning that I have learned to make beds and change adult briefs, all you college grads should have no trouble deciphering my writing!)

Bah.

House Won't Cut Public Broadcasting Funds

WASHINGTON - Big Bird and National Public Radio won a reprieve Thursday as the House restored $100 million that had been proposed as a budget cut for the Corporation for Public Broadcasting. The 284-140 vote demonstrated the enduring political strength of public broadcasting, whose supporters rallied behind popular programs such as "Sesame Street," "Postcards From Buster" and "The NewsHour With Jim Lehrer."

I do plan to do some more Randblogging in the very near future. I know you're all absolutely champing at the bit for more of that. Just be patient.

Found this on Old Whig's other site, I think, which he posted a long time ago. So I went and took the quiz, and have no idea what the results mean.

And I think I'm glad I don't.

You scored as Existentialist. Existentialism emphasizes human capability. There is no greater power interfering with life and thus it is up to us to make things happen. Sometimes considered a negative and depressing world view, your optimism towards human accomplishment is immense. Mankind is condemned to be free and must accept the responsibility. Existentialist 56% Idealist 50% Cultural Creative 44% Fundamentalist 38% Modernist 31% Materialist 31% Romanticist 31% Postmodernist 31% What is Your World View? (updated) created with QuizFarm.com

Memories from long ago...

As the old inter-generational hyperbole goes, "When I was your age... I had to walk 20 miles to and from school each day in snow up to my waist-- and it was uphill both ways." It usually can be interpreted as, "Stop your whining, you big Wuss," to a member of the next generation who complains that the world in some way doesn't conform to his image and likeness. As ludicrous as that hyperbole is, it really isn't that far off. I could only imagine what a modern social worker would think about some of the conditions in which we grew up.

The upstairs of the house in which we lived for many years while growing up was one large room. There was but one light in the room on the ceiling near the stairway. Having no switch, the light had to be turned on and off by climbing the rickety railing around the steep stairway to screw the bulb in or out.

Although this room was ‘the boys room’, there were other lodgers– rats. I was not entirely comfortable with our guests so I slept with an opened jackknife under my pillow for purposes of hand to paw combat.

In his younger days Dad used to be a trapper. He still kept a passel of mink, muskrat, and beaver traps which became some of our favorite toys. The mink traps were quite effective in nabbing gophers and rats on the farm. One of my older brothers, Jerry, and I colluded in a scheme to use these to effect a welcome upon our non-paying residents.

In the wee hours one night my brother and I were rudely awakened by the harsh snap of cold steel as one trap was triggered. I scurried up the teetering railing to screw in the bulb to see the result of the clamor with adrenaline pumping wildly through my system.

As our eyes adjusted to the light, the fruit of our efforts became apparent. The large Norway rat, with its hind paw caught in the trap’s jaws, sat there glaring at us drumming his front claws on the wooden floor as if to say, “Ok, what now, hotshots?” Hmmm! Good question.

Jerry, the bold one, took a boot and at the risk of his own life, commenced awailin’ blows upon the large rodent. Rats are pretty tough so he took the beating unharmed and escaped back within the walls.

At any rate, I think we earned some respect. We seemed to have fewer indoor encounters after that.

I don’t quite recall, but I think I may have stayed up on the top of that railing for a day or two before descending back into our savage jungle. Jerry, always the encourager, helped calm my fears by saying, “Come on down and stop your whining, you big Wuss, before I beat the crap out of ya!” “When I was your age...”

In honor of Father's Day, I present...my father, like you've never seen him before!


Me, Grandpa John, and Mr. Pterodactyl, barely out of the egg.


Dig those crazy pants. Does it reflect worse on me for wearing them, or on Dad for willingly being seen in public with me wearing those pants?


Ah, the 70s. That's Mr. Pterry in the corner.

Victor Davis Hanson:

If Japan was once experiencing bouts of anti-Americanism when its neighbor China was sleeping, then Europe was relatively friendly to us when we kept 300 Soviet divisions from its borders.

The moral? Trashing the United States can be a fun sport for some when one nearby communist enemy disappears, but not so for others when another is ascendant and close by.

Kinda like how Dad was so cool when he was giving me money to see a movie, but such a moron when he made me mow the lawn.

Hanson has written on this subject before.

I tend to look askew at studies that compare the U.S. to other nations, but this one caught my eye:

Experience of 30 Nations Offer Lessons for Social Security Reform

Thirty countries have reformed their pay-as-you-go Social Security systems with personal retirement accounts (PRAs). As a result of these changes, Britain, Chile and many others have virtually no unfunded liability. By contrast, the U.S. Social Security system is facing an unfunded liability of $11 trillion - about the size of the entire U.S. economy.

Bumper Stickers

Haven't done this in a while. Saw this one the other day:

186,000 miles/second: It's Not Just a Good Idea, It's the Law

A little too much verbage for a bumper sticker - the lettering gets too small to read when you shove that much into it.

I have seen larger-sized bumper stickers. Saw one just the other day: it said "America First" and was stuck to the back of a Toyota pickup, right over the word "Toyota."

Nice little bit of irony there. He also had a Kerry for President sticker. Must be Union.

Lastly, one I've been saving for a while:

Liberals treat animals like people. Conservatives treat people like animals.

My first reaction to this bumper sticker was: this is a shot at conservatives - while liberals are compassionate toward all of God's creatures...um, I mean with all Goddess' creatures...um, right? Ah, the hell with it...conservatives are equally exploitive of them all.

But here's my problem: if, as this says, liberals treat animals like people, then it is also true that they treat people like animals.

The same goes for conservatives: if we treat people like animals, then the reverse is also true.

Ergo, conservatives treat people like liberals treat animals: like people. This bumper sticker is some kind of New-Age touchy-feely we're-not-really-all-that-different sort of message.

Yuck.

On the other hand, we can easily disprove the first of those two statements: I think it's safe to assume that a greater percentage of liberals than conservatives are vegetarians, but all liberals are not vegetarians. If liberals truly treated animals and people alike, then...

You want fries with that?

And, since a majority of conservatives (I assume) experience a Pavlovian need for a napkin when they walk through the County Fair (as I do, especially walking through the pig barn), we can conclude that, according to this bumper sticker, both liberals and conservatives tend toward cannibalism.

Hm. Maybe I need to work on that some more.

I think what this does conclusively prove is: I'm too smart to be a liberal. Or not smart enough. Or something.

Is it Friday yet? I need a drink.

Nerd Alert!

David Sutherland, one of the original artists who worked on Dungeons and Dragons, passed away this week.

This was the guy who did the covers of the original Dungeon Master's Guide and Monster Manual, and a bunch of other stuff.

RANDBLOGGING - Part VI

Hank Reardon really needs to work on his pillow talk.

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV
Part V

This is so much fun, I posted it in its entirety. Read the whole thing.

Happy Days
by John Samples

"I never think of the future. It comes soon enough."

"What? Who said that?" Colin said, giving me a puzzled look. We had been drinking lattes and chatting about his plan to get a masters degree in computer science. He had expected me to say something worthwhile about his plan. I had disrupted his expectations. Colin is my son. My job is to disrupt his expectations.

"Albert Einstein. I think it's some sort of joke about relativity or about the fate of the universe or something. But never mind, that's too hard to understand. Your plans reminded me of the quote."

"How?" Colin was still puzzled and thus interested.

"Like the man says, never think of the future. That's where you're going wrong. You're thinking of the future just like everyone says you are supposed to. That's what makes you a sucker. In particular, you're falling for the human capital argument, the idea that you should improve your skills through education or what the economists unimaginatively call 'training.' Since the returns to education are really high, you get richer and everyone gets richer."

"Yeah. That's the idea. I mean it worked for you, even you. What could be wrong with it?"

I paused. Even me? About once an hour Colin forces you to recalculate his costs and benefits to determine whether he's a plus or minus.

"The future has to be like the past. Over the past three decades the returns to education have been astronomical. Spend more on education, get more income after taxes. But your working life will be over the next five decades at least. That future doesn't have to be like that past. In fact, the signs are you should do what Einstein says."

"I don't get it."

"Look at this way. It doesn't matter whether education increases your productivity unless you get to keep enough of the added wealth to justify the high cost of a degree. Even with the tax rates we have, the added education made sense for my generation, but it probably won't for your generation."

"Why not?"

"You've got debts to pay. Other people's debts. There's $11 trillion or so for Social Security that's not provided for now. You'll have a sizable chunk of that, and it's not the scary part. Medicare has a $60 or $70 trillion shortfall, somewhere in there. $16 trillion for the prescription drug benefit alone. As it is. Not as it will grow to be."

"So?"

"So, someone's got to pay for those programs. The generation that will receive the Social Security that you have to pay for."

"You mean your generation, old man," Colin laughed.

"Right, my generation. We have paid for the benefits of earlier generations, benefits that were huge compared to that generation's taxes. So we expect you to do the same for us. But here's the beauty and the horror of it. The benefits I get, and the debt you pay, is not fixed. It can be anything depending on what Congress passes into law.

"So my generation votes benefits for itself that must be paid for in the future, by future people, people that don't exist now, or people like you that do exist now but not in the way they will exist in the future. People that don't exist can't vote. Future people who can't vote pay for benefits for current people who can. Got it?"

"I suppose."

"But there's a problem. Everything depends on you being a sucker. You must get more education and become more productive to pay the debts of my generation. The added money from your added education and work will be taxed away one way or another to pay for Medicare and Social Security. The debts are just too large.

"So everything depends on you getting more education and becoming more productive despite the fact doing so will be a losing proposition over your life. To make it work, you have to never think about the future. You need to be a sucker or the entitlement state will break down. But you'll get the final laugh."

"I don't see much that could be amusing here," he remarked.

"Well, consider this, my boy: You're not a sucker. Neither are the other people like you, the people who will produce the most wealth in the future. You all will realize that it doesn't make much sense to invest in yourselves or in the businesses of other people when the returns go down the entitlement sinkholes. So you won't make the investments, and the economy will turn sluggish and sooner rather than later we will become a dying economy, like France or Germany. It might even happen before the current generation dies out.

"We might live to experience and to see the disaster brought by our demands for entitlements. We have to hope you don't think about the future and that the future doesn't come too soon. We have to be the opposite of Einstein, which is good reason for you to follow his advice."

"I think that's ironic, not amusing," Colin said.

"Or tragic. Say, are you paying for these lattes?"

Cool.

Earth's “Bigger Cousin” Detected

Astronomers announced today the discovery of the smallest planet so far found outside of our solar system. About seven-and-a-half times as massive as Earth, and about twice as wide, this new extrasolar planet may be the first rocky world ever found orbiting a star similar to our own.

"This is the smallest extrasolar planet yet detected and the first of a new class of rocky terrestrial planets," said team member Paul Butler of the Carnegie Institution of Washington. "It's like Earth's bigger cousin."

Currently around 150 extrasolar planets are known, and the number continues to grow. But most of these far-off worlds are large gas giants like Jupiter. Only recently have astronomers started detecting smaller massed objects

"We keep pushing the limits of what we can detect, and we're getting closer and closer to finding Earths," said team member Steven Vogt from the University of California, Santa Cruz.

The discovery of Earth’s distant cousin was announced today at a press conference at the National Science Foundation in Arlington, Va.

The new planet orbits Gliese 876, an M dwarf star 15 light years away in the constellation Aquarius. The “super-Earth” is not alone: there are two other planets – both Jupiter-sized – in the same system. This third world was detected by a tiny extra wobble that it caused in the central star.

From this wobble, the researchers measured a minimum mass for the new planet of 5.9 Earth masses. The planet orbits makes a full orbit in a speedy 1.94 days, implying a distance to the central star of 2 million miles – or about 2 percent of the distance between the Earth and the Sun.

Orbiting so close to its star, scientists speculate that the planet’s temperature is a toasty 400 to 750 degrees Fahrenheit (200 to 400 degrees Celsius). This is likely too hot for the planet to retain much gas, like Jupiter does. Therefore, the planet must be mostly solid.

"The planet's mass could easily hold onto an atmosphere," said Gregory Laughlin from UC Santa Cruz. "It would still be considered a rocky planet, probably with an iron core and a silicon mantle. It could even have a dense steamy water layer.”

RANDBLOGGING - part V

Just finished Chapter 6. Oh, what glorious sarcasm. It's almost dripping from the pages - both implied and inferred, and so subtle (except for Francisco's speech to Jim Taggart). So ingrained into the storyline.

Claude Slagenhop, president of the non-profit charitable Friends of Global Progress (page 132): "I've said in all my speeches that it's not necessary to talk too much."

Dr. Pritchett, the philosophy professor (page 129): "A free economy cannot exist without competition. Therefore, men must be forced to compete. Therefore, we must control men in order to force them to be free."

Couple good gender-war shots in here, too: Lillian's "I have never entertained the illusion that men are superior to animals" (well, duh, we're not - was that supposed to be an insult?); and the literature professor calling Dagny Taggart a "symptom of the illness of our century...a woman who runs a railroad" instead of staying barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen.

Nice. Very nice.

This thing about John Galt having been sucked down into Atlantis - not sure what to make of that.

I'm a hundred and fifty-seven pages into this thing, and it's like I haven't even cracked it yet. This is a looooooong book.

Part I
Part II
Part III
Part IV

Even a dead squirrel sometimes finds a nut.

From the Asheville, NC Citizen Times, a letter to the editor (emphasis added):

Unnecessary squirrel death reminder of our responsibility

I am an animal lover. I am shocked at the speed of automobiles on the Blue Ridge Parkway and have reported same to the rangers.

On a recent Sunday I saw a little squirrel halfway across the road. A driver approached and could have more than given the squirrel time to get out of danger, but no. He hit the little squirrel. I jumped out hoping he was only dazed. I picked him up, trying to breathe air into his nostrils — his heart was still beating — yet he died in my arms before I got home.

This indifference must end — they are God’s creations. We are responsible for their welfare.

Faye Arrington,

Asheville

Do you know where your pets are?

Alligator Found In Kenosha County Back Yard

Huh.

Victor Davis Hanson: The world will soon better appreciate the United States

As nations come to know the Chinese, and as a ripe Europe increasingly cannot or will not defend itself, the old maligned United States will begin to look pretty good again. More important, America will not be the world's easily caricatured sole power, but more likely the sole democratic superpower that factors in morality in addition to national interest in its treatment of others.

China is strong without morality; Europe is impotent in its ethical smugness. The buffer United States, in contrast, believes morality is not mere good intentions but the willingness and ability to translate easy idealism into hard and messy practice.

Huh.

The American Enterprise: Are We A Privileged Planet?:

One thing we learn right away in elementary physics is that gas is the least dense state of matter, liquids are in the middle, and solids are the densest. That's because the molecules are loosely associated in gases, adhere together somewhat in liquids, and are tightly bound together in solids.

There is one glaring exception, however - ice. Unlike any other element or compound, H2O is lighter as a solid - ice - it is as a liquid - water. No other substance has this property. Is this a big deal? It certainly is. It just so happens that it made the evolution of life possible.

If ice were heavier than water, it would sink to the bottom in a lake or shallow sea. Then, more water would freeze on the surface and sink again and soon the whole body of water would be frozen solid from top to bottom. Anything living in that lake or shallow sea would die. Since most life originated in water, living forms never could have survived.

Instead, ice floats. Why? There doesn't seem to be any real explanation. I've always thought it was evidence that God was willing to admit His mistakes and bend the rules when it counted. When He was finished designing the fundaments of the universe - gases, liquids, and solids - He said, 'Oh, darn, I forgot. This isn't going to work.' So, He made that one exception. All solids shall be denser than their liquids except water. That way life could evolve.

Another forgotten anniversary.

I just noticed: Grandpa John's got started one year and two days ago today.

We had some pretty interesting discussions back then.

RANDBLOGGING - Part IV

Part I
Part II
Part III

Brief recap: the San Sebastian mines were worthless, and there's no way Francisco D'Anconia didn't know it before he sunk all those millions into it. Now he expects a domino effect: the other successful businesses are all going down.

Now, this is a guy who knows how to strategize! He's deliberately bringing all the achievers down, letting the softies succeed, so he can swoop in later and clean up! That's how he's going to keep his pledge of doubling his family's fortune.

I love how they call the non-capitalists "looters."

Oh, and did anybody else notice that "who is John Galt" is an anagram of "a Whig's jolt, hon." I think that's what Ayn Rand said to her husband when he asked her what she was working on.

Lileks on Revenge of the Sith.

My favorite part:

If you’re going to be using a lot of Force Lightning, you’re going to want a good moisturizer. It’s hell on the gums too, apparently. Forget about brushing and flossing, pal – they don’t call it the Dark side for nothing.

An interview with Darth Vader.

I knew I liked the Sith for some reason.

After spending many long years and billions of dollars on the psychiatrist's couch attempting to overcome my deep-seated feelings of inadequacy and rejection, I have finally succeeded in experiencing an epiphany.

As you may or may not know, the members of the nuclear family in which I was raised were named: John, Sr., Julia, Jean, John, Jr., Jerry, and Jim. In between Jerry and Jim came the rejected one, Steve. Oh, how my life has been misery from my youth. But now ,with my new found understanding, I have triumphed over that hellish rejection. You may have noticed that I have taken on the nickname of JJJJawbone! I'm free, I'm free! No more rejection!

There is one drawback, however. Although Jawbone begins with my much coveted 'J', the full nickname is 'Jawbone of an Ass'. Therefore the feeling of inadequacy is somewhat heightened. But, I can live with that!

RANDBLOGGING - Part III

Part I
Part II

So, the anti-capitalist railroad owners pass the "Anti-dog eat dog world" resolution to restrict competition. Dan Conway (owner of the Phoenix-Durango line) will now abandon his successful Colorado business, because he agreed to abide by the majority's decision.

Interesting to see Dagny Taggart's response: this guy is her main competition in Colorado, and now he’s out of the way. Yet she's horrified by this trickery.

Means one of two things - or more likely both. She simply has that much respect for the competitive, capitalist process, even though she probably wouldn’t put it that way.

I think it’s something else: an inability to recognize new and unique challenges.

I'm reminded of the many times I've heard people complain about "office politics." They can't get this done, or can't accomplish that, because of office politics.

My inward reaction is: well, why don't you win?

That's what's going on here: two characters, Dagny Taggart and Dan Conway (probably Hank Reardon and Eddie Willers, too), are focused, able, overachievers, but aren't capable of thinking strategically and “out of the box.”

They’re 10th degree black belts who expect everybody to challenge them physically. When somebody files a lawsuit, they’re completely helpless.

We’ll see if they figure this out in time to do any good. Political strategy takes time, though, so it might already be too late.

Ha!

Trawlermen fire potatoes at Greenpeace activists

Greenpeace said fishermen fired potatoes at the group's activists today when they used inflatable boats to disrupt a trawling ship near New Zealand in a protest timed to coincide with UN talks on managing the world's oceans.

The activists delayed the trawler Ocean Reward in the Tasman Sea for about an hour by attaching a life raft to its net, Greenpeace campaigner Carmen Gravatt said from aboard the protest vessel Rainbow Warrior.

The trawler's crew turned a high-pressure water hose on the activists and 'used a compressed air gun to shoot potatoes at us,' she said, adding that nobody 'was hit by any of the stuff they threw at us.'

From Warren Bell at The Corner:

DRIVING ON THE LEFT

From emailer Sarah in Maryland:

I thought you might appreciate the car I saw on my commute this morning. She had the "Darwin fish" and the following bumper stickers:
* Oh Lord Please Protect Me From Your Followers
* Don't Pray in My School and I Won't Think in Your Church
* Doing My Best to P--- Off the Religious Right

But then she also had a sticker that said:
"It is Not our Differences That Divide Us -- It is Our Inability to Understand and Celebrate Those Differences."

Carroll criticized

An incensed coach Mike Sherman dressed down cornerback Ahmad Carroll midway through practice after Carroll hit Donald Driver on a pass across the middle.

'I do not want you driving through receivers catching the ball. You do it again, you're off the field. Do you understand that?' Sherman shouted.

When Carroll didn't immediately acknowledge him, Sherman got in Carroll's face and repeated himself, 'Do you understand that?'

I understand they want to keep guys from getting hurt in the preseason, and to keep them as healthy as possible for as long as possible during the season.

But tackling has been a problem for this team the last few years. When and how, exactly, do they practice that?

How to Recognize a Millionaire

I just had to lift this from Shokai: Buddha Rhubarb Butter.

Caught a bit of The Simpsons last night. The family was re-enacting various historical happenstances. One situation was concerning Joan of Arc. A portion of the dialogue went thusly:

(Speaker of unknown significance) "...and we'll win the victory."
(Homer) "Victory? We're French! We don't even have a word for that!"

Thank you, Lance, for remembering our anniversary. Seven years. Linda and I both agreed that it has been a success in that we haven't killed one another yet.

She worked a ten hour shift with her case in Evansville. I worked thirteen hours with my case in Janesville. Cards, flowers, fine dining on carry-out Mac double cheeseburgers, and crashing early. The romance is still there.

RANDBLOGGING - Part II

On this guy Reardon: if I was the owner of a mega-million-dollar steel company, I think I could arrange to have my shrew of a wife and various other family members...uh...relocated. Right. That's what I mean.

Seriously, this is a guy so focused he thinks memories are an unnecessary indulgence, but he's still trying to get along with these people. Granted, we're getting this from his perspective. Maybe we'd understand why they are the way they are if we were getting more of their side.

So far the story seems to be breaking people into two groups: those who are exceptionally qualified to succeed but are so focused on their goals they can't see the bigger picture (Reardon, Dagny Taggart), and those who can't compete with the first group so they look to other avenues - government interference, for example (Joe Taggart, Orrin Boyle, etc.).

I both respect and loathe both groups for different reasons.

I bet I can make a UN vs. US metaphor out of it.

The bar scene: lots of infuriating things said about private property being a "trusteeship held for the benefit of society." Somehow, though, I don't think the people at the table actually believe that - I think they're doing the political thing: if it was to their advantage to support private property rights, they would. We'll see if I'm right.

DON'T TELL ME HOW IT ENDS.


Part I

I would like to recommend checking out Collin's blog. He's just 16 and just started blogging in May. I sometimes try to remember my intellect at 16. It did have a reasonable amount of sobriety due to Viet Nam staring me in the face. But I was also awash in '60s liberalism. Far out, right on, peace!!

June 6. D-Day, and, I think, not coincidentally, Uncle Steve/Jawbone and Aunt Linda's anniversary.

See, I forget my own parents' anniversaries, because they didn't get married on an easy-to-remember date like this.

Lileks.

Yes, that’s what I want. I want the pizza shop’s slogan to be something like “Sausage so fresh the screams of the pig still bounce off the slaughterhouse wall!” Really I do.

How does he come up with this stuff? Does he keep it all in a can in the backyard, and just shake it once in a while to see what falls out?

Kurt at Lakeshore Laments points to this Washington Post story about embryonic stem cells, and how maybe you don't need an embryo to create them.

...the gathering consensus among biologists is that embryonic stem cells are made, not born — and that embryos are not an essential ingredient. That means that today’s heated debates over embryo rights could fade in the aftermath of technical advances allowing scientists to convert ordinary cells into embryonic stem cells.

RANDBLOGGING

Okay, anybody who's spent any time surfing the blogosphere knows: there are all kinds of blogging. Catblogging, travelblogging, protestblogging, foodblogging, what have you.

Well, we here at Grandpa John's - always on the cutting edge - have something new to offer the world.

Randblogging.

That's right. I, Lance, am a Rand virgin. I've heard about it, talked about it, even lied a little bit about it. But I've never read any of it.

A couple days ago I pulled an old, yellowed copy of Atlas Shrugged out of an upstairs bookshelf and thought: now's the time.

And when I say old, I mean old. The price on the cover is $1.75.

I'm going to read this enormous book with its tiny print and yellow pages (unless I go blind first, or find a better copy at the library), and I'm going to post my thoughts RIGHT HERE at GRANDPA JOHN'S from time to time, as I do so, in UNEDITED format.

So, without further ado, I give you: My Thoughts on Chapter One.

Whaddawegothere? An oak tree (I bet I hear about this again before I'm done with this book), a railroad, a few interesting characters so far.

Older brother, wimpy, careful, slow to make decisions. Has a conscience, wants to help others. Younger sister, decisive, risktaker, focused on a goal and the goal is to: get the railroad going and make lots of money.

Knowing that this book is the Grail of fiscal libertarians, I think I see where this is going.

I actually know somebody named Dagny. She's absolutely nothing like this character.

The oak tree, this concerto she thinks she remembers but was never actually written - these are going to be important, I think.

And I tell you what, whoever this John Galt is better stand up pretty soon because THAT is getting ANNOYING.

Thus ends the first installment of Randblogging with Grandpa John. We hope you'll join us again for our next installment.

This is why I like Jonah Goldberg:

If Schadenfreude is taking pleasure in the misfortune of others, then I've got a case of Eurofreude - or Francofreude, or maybe something else. All I know is this: The Europeans who annoy me are moping like they found a fingernail in their brie, and I'm feeling mighty freude. Or schaden. Or whatever.

The older I get, the better I used to be.
Memories from times past...

David tweaks Goliath.

High School boys varsity basketball, Edna H.S. (Tex.) vs. the visiting Gonzales. The ball is passed into Edna's big center in the low post. He turns, shoots, and scores. As the official in the lead position, I blow the whistle, wipe off the basket, and signal traveling. The Edna head coach goes ballistic. The identical situation occurs two, three, and four times during the game. The Edna coach is beside himself.

After the game, the coach enters the official's dressing room to complain about those specific calls. He learned to use that specific move for his low post players during a off season coach's clinic– a clinic taught by Guy Lewis.

Guy Lewis... “After serving in the Army Air Corps in World War II, Lewis played basketball at the University of Houston, graduating in 1947. He became an assistant coach at the school in 1953 and took over as head coach in 1956.

A colorful dresser who flourished a red and white towel on the sideline, Lewis remained at Houston through the 1985-86 season. The school had 27 straight winning seasons and 14 seasons with 20 or more wins during his tenure.

Lewis guided 14 teams into the NCAA tournament and 5 of them reached the final four. However, Houston lost both times it reached the championship game, to North Carolina State in 1983 and to Georgetown in 1984.

In his 30 seasons, Lewis had a 592-279 record for a .680 winning percentage. He is 20th on the all-time NCAA Division I victory list.”

Guy Lewis coached Elvin Hayes when they upset Lew Alcindor (Kareem) and John Wooden’s UCLA Bruins. Lewis also coached the infamous Phi Slama Jama teams with Clyde ‘The Glide’ Drexler and (H)Akeem Olajuwon.

The Edna coach and I parted with no resolution. That was the end of that... I thought.

A couple of weeks later the president of our Official’s Chapter brought the incident back to my attention. It seems the Edna coach sought proof of my error from the higher powers. The issue went all the way up to the head of the Southwest Official’s Association, Datson Lewis. (No relation to Guy.) I was told that my calls were correct and that Datson was going to get on Guy Lewis’ case for teaching an illegal move to the coaches attending his clinic.

Phew!

And to all those fans over the years that screamed about my blindness, ignorance, and my momma... Bite me!

I had a few posts in the queue last week that I never got around to, so here they are:

This fantastic column by sci-fi writer Orson Scott Card, about the Newsweek Koran story.

The world's biggest medieval siege engine - a trebuchet - will be fully operational and under attack by Rebel forces later this year.

This quote from a Jonah Goldberg column:

Did you know - and I am not making this up - that in the 1980s, Nancy Reagan's White House staff was larger than FDR's at the height of World War II?

And last but not least, How to Brew Beer in a Coffee Pot

Feingold's gonna need some Chap-Stick after this guy gets done kissing his butt.

Nicholas Jon Wood has written a fawning, worshipful, nearly-3000 word column explaining why Russ Feingold can/should/will be the next President.

The whole thing is screaming for a fisking, but due to its length and my lack of desire to put that kind of time in, I'll settle for a few paragraphs.

Feingold, though, is not a conventional politician. He is the cure for what ails this nation. Not since Watergate has the mood of the country toward politics been so pessimistic. The disputed 2000 election, an extremely secretive Bush administration, and a bitter '04 presidential campaign where both honesty and integrity took backseats to baseless ads and slanderous attacks, has made Americans disenchanted with government. Stout in his convictions, resolutely honest, and a man who always puts principles before politics, Russ Feingold can remedy all of that.

Nick Andriacchi, former director of Wisconsin's Assembly Democratic Campaign Committee, believes this to be his signature asset. "His biggest quality is conviction before politics," observed Andriacchi. "That resonates in Wisconsin, where he has clearly positioned himself as a maverick. The Democratic Party needs someone who can't be fingered for politics as usual, and he could be it."

A Feingold presidency could be as inspiring as another youthful, well-spoken senator a half century earlier. He could be the new leader of a country desperately in need of honest, intelligent leadership. He could again give the world a reason to respect the United States. Two and a-half years out from the Iowa caucuses, Feingold has the honesty, background, resume, intangibles, and – perhaps most important – the ``story'' to be the nation's next president.

Must...keep...gorge...from...rising...

What, precisely, is this "story" Wood is talking about?

Born to an attorney and an abstractor – two civic-minded middle-class parents in Janesville – Feingold excelled at Craig High School, graduating in 1971. He then moved north from this blue-collar town renowned for quality automobile production to the capital city to earn his undergraduate degree...

Ugh. He then headed to Oxford as a Rhodes Scholar. Or, as Wood puts it:

In making this prestigious academic pilgrimage, he followed closely in the footsteps of able statesmen, including future president William Jefferson Clinton. Feingold's year abroad left an indelible mark, promising a path toward public service, one previously nurtured by his parents.

Then he graduated with honors from Harvard Law, and went into politics a few years later. "Eschewing a conventional step-ladder approach to political ascendancy," he ran for State Senate and won in a squeaker, then won an underdog primary and an underdog general election to the U.S. Senate.

These are impressive accomplishments, and I'm not saying otherwise. But...this is the great "story" that will propel him into the White House?

Wood counts Feingold's religion and two divorces as disadvantages. As he puts it: "His campaign insider thinks it probably won't be an advantage, but in reality it is too soon to tell."

Another disadvantage: his promotion of campaign finance reform, which will make him look like a hypocrite when he tries to raise the money a presidential campaign requires.

His advantages: his "story" (according to Wood), his outsider status, his charisma and political skill. I would add better-than-average name recognition nationwide (thanks to McCain-Feingold), and that he comes from a swing state, which will make him extremely attractive as a Veep candidate.

See, I don't disagree with Wood. I just wanted to make a little fun of what looks to me like groveling, bootlicking adulation.

It seems th