Steve
Although I have been posting sparingly as of late, I have heard no complaints. So, being of a cantankerous sort, I figure that it is about time to get back at it. Of course, everyone knows that there just must be a very good reason for my absence and indeed there is.
As of late, I have been in close association and negotiation with my long-time friend, Barry Bonds. He likes to hang around with me in that no one would ever think that I even knew what steroids were let alone used or supplied them. And it doesn't hurt his reputation by being seen with one of such integrity and dignity.
Together, we have come up with an ingenious scheme to defuse the steroid flap that dominates the recent sporting press concerning the accusations made in Jose Canseco's newly released book, Juiced. Barry and I are going to embark on authoring a series of books for the purpose of muckraking other key professions. The editions concerning politicians, lawyers, and used car salesman will be the easiest, but for strategic purposes we will initiate the series of exposes by unmasking the journalism profession. We have found a down-on-his-luck writer and have allowed him to shed light on the inner workings of the press. He revealed to us of his collaborations in plagerized works, knowingly falsified information and documents, and conclusions with no basis in fact. He names names, gives specific dates, and passed a polygraph that is to be aired at the proper time. He has been interviewed by Mark McGuire, Pudge Rodriguez, and Gary Sheffield. These will also be released at a strategic time corresponding with the promotion of our book(s).
Barry and I postulate that this blizzard of accusation swirling in the air will redirect the heat from the athletes and allow them to get back to playing the games of little boys with dignity and pride.
Although I have been posting sparingly as of late, I have heard no complaints. So, being of a cantankerous sort, I figure that it is about time to get back at it. Of course, everyone knows that there just must be a very good reason for my absence and indeed there is.
As of late, I have been in close association and negotiation with my long-time friend, Barry Bonds. He likes to hang around with me in that no one would ever think that I even knew what steroids were let alone used or supplied them. And it doesn't hurt his reputation by being seen with one of such integrity and dignity.
Together, we have come up with an ingenious scheme to defuse the steroid flap that dominates the recent sporting press concerning the accusations made in Jose Canseco's newly released book, Juiced. Barry and I are going to embark on authoring a series of books for the purpose of muckraking other key professions. The editions concerning politicians, lawyers, and used car salesman will be the easiest, but for strategic purposes we will initiate the series of exposes by unmasking the journalism profession. We have found a down-on-his-luck writer and have allowed him to shed light on the inner workings of the press. He revealed to us of his collaborations in plagerized works, knowingly falsified information and documents, and conclusions with no basis in fact. He names names, gives specific dates, and passed a polygraph that is to be aired at the proper time. He has been interviewed by Mark McGuire, Pudge Rodriguez, and Gary Sheffield. These will also be released at a strategic time corresponding with the promotion of our book(s).
Barry and I postulate that this blizzard of accusation swirling in the air will redirect the heat from the athletes and allow them to get back to playing the games of little boys with dignity and pride.
2 comments:
You think politicians are scared of a little muckraking? There's no such thing as bad publicity, especially when it's an attack by a seccessionist Texan.
I have photographs and videos that include dead girls and live boys!
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