Tuesday, November 22, 2005

One early afternoon while I was walking the dog, I passed by Adams Elementary School. One group of children was nearby jumping rope. It reminded me of an old song of quite a long time ago. I don't know who wrote or performed it, but I believe it was titled, 'Skip-a-Rope.'

"Listen to your children while they play... Ain't it kind of funny what the children say... Skip-a-rope,.. Skip-a-rope..."

Since the dog decided to assault a fire hydrant and its surrounding ecosystem, I thought that I would get closer to listen to the group's jump rope game.

One of the players who wanted to enter the twirling rope would say, "Who's your daddy?" One of the ropers would ask, "Category?" The jumper would leap into the moving rope and indicate a category. The twirler would name a person in that category and the jumper would 'name his or her daddy' as poetically as possible. I'm not quite sure how they kept score, but I think accepted answers moved the particular jumper up a grade.

"Who's your daddy?"
"Category?"
"Sports."
"Pedro Martinez."
"Pedro, who's your daddy? The Yankees of New York hit you like a dork!"
"You pass!"

"Who's your daddy?"
"Category?"
"The media!"
"The New York Times!"
"NY Times, who's your daddy? The Yugo more than Mazda, your mentor is from Pravda."
"You pass!"

"Who's your daddy?"
"Category?"
"Politicians."
"Teddy Kennedy."
"Teddy Kennedy, who's your daddy? For the revenuers, you must watch, 'cause your daddy's bootleg Scotch!"
"You pass!"

"Who's your daddy?"
"Category?"
"Politicians."
"John Kerry."
"John Kerry, who's your daddy? Eee-yew, eee-yew, it's so gross, your home-boy daddy is George Soros!"
"You pass!"

"Who's your daddy?"
"Category?"
"Sports."
"Chicago Bears."
"Chicago Bears, who's your daddy? With your record you feel marv, but your daddy is still Bret Favre!"
"You pass, twice!"

"Who's your daddy?"
"Category?'
"Movie stars."
"Michael Moore."
"Michael Moore, who's your daddy? Ain't got none, that's the word, 'cause you're a dirty, lying tird!"

The bell rang and the kids scrambled back into the school building. The dog had finished creating a rain forest, so we continued our walk. I decided along the route that if anyone were to 'diss' this next generation, I would just smile and ask, "Who's your daddy?"

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