Thursday, January 05, 2006

It's a sign from God!

When I first joined the Army, the recruiter handed me a thick green book - the Book of Common Tasks. These are the things every soldier is supposed to know.

He said: "Put this in your bathroom. Every time you use the bathroom,* read a task." So I did, and by the time I got to Basic I already knew most of the book.

Like a lot of churchgoing folk, I find it difficult to keep up with regular study of the Bible. So I decided to try the same tactic on my Bible reading that worked so well with Army reading. I bought two Bibles at the Dollar Store, and put them in our bathrooms.

I know what you're thinking. Reading the Bible? On the toilet?

Like God doesn't know what I'm doing, or something.

You can't make any jokes I haven't already heard from the guys at my church. In fact, they let me have it pretty good the first time I told them what I was doing.

And then, the next time I...um...sat down to...um...read, I opened up to Revelations, chapter 4. In particular, verse 2:

At once I was in the spirit, and there in heaven stood a throne, with one seated on the throne!
And that, my friends, is a sign from God.


*Not his exact words.

2 comments:

Steve said...

That's the trouble with postmodernism-- everyone is trying to usurp that throne.

And, Lance, the study of the end times is eschatology, not scatology.

Steve said...

Lance,
I expect you were able to finish the entire book in just a few 'sittings' since you are generally full of it.