Wednesday, April 12, 2006

It's a Proven Fact

Pop science is a wonderful thing. Begin with a hypothesis, construct an experiment, throw some selected data in a pot, mix in a pinch of socio-political artifact, and voila-- truth: Global warming, global cooling, Lance's global moderation, macro-evolution, death by butter, oat bran causing cancer and then curing it, overpopulation, labor shortage, fish fatty acids are healthy, fish mercury is deadly, ginko biloba improves memory if you ever remember where you put it,...

Recently science from a Berkley study over 40 years proved than whiny kids grew up to be conservatives. --Dr. Spock, er... Stock.

Microbiologists Brack and Zhang proved Liberals in general were 43% more likely to report general anxiety disorder than Conservatives, 115% more likely to report panic disorders, 119% more likely to report agoraphobic symptoms, 118% more likely to report OCD symptoms. and 54% more likely to report social anxiety disorder. (My addition of socio-political artifactual seasoning also concluded that Liberals are 173% more likely to be mendaxophiles and factophobes.)

In digesting all of this proof, I am not sure that the earth isn't flat.

1 comment:

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RS Gold