Barry Spikes His Piano

The rumor mill in my secret basement laboratory has it that Barry Manilow has taken a page out of Pete Townshend's playbook after an SRO performance at Orfordville's Outdoor Theater/Flea Market last week.


During the performance, Barry explained that he could not, in good conscience, appear on the TV show The View because of a philosophical clash with the conservative ogre, Elizabeth Hasselbeck. "I strongly disagree with her views. I think she's dangerous and offensive. I will not be on the same stage as her."1

In a fit of outrage and performance theatrics Manilow ended his performance by lifting his piano over his head and smashing it on the ground offstage hitting one roady on the head and nearly killing two others.



All three of the audience members stood up, leaned on their walkers, and applauded shouting, "Wilson lied and doughboys died!"

(Rumor also has it that there is more than one Barry that has been using steroids.)

Dr. Sanity's Carnival of the Insanities is again spotlighting the world's eccentricities.

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