Thus saith Science Almighty :
The startling claim is made by a pair of American cosmologists investigating the consequences for the cosmos of quantum theory, the most successful theory we have.[...]We finally have the proof. In all my aged wisdom, I never thought that I would have to ever recant my beliefs and pay homage to the sagacity of the Far Left. I can no longer resist their claims as The Science (All praises to The Science and His prophets) has reached a consensus.
In a nutshell, the theory suggests that we change things simply by looking at them and theorists have puzzled over the implications for years.[...]
New Scientist reports a worrying new variant as the cosmologists claim that astronomers may have accidentally nudged the universe closer to its death by observing dark energy, a mysterious anti gravity force which is thought to be speeding up the expansion of the cosmos.[...]
The claims of the Far Left are scientifically based conclusions. While the Bush administration observed the growth and progress of tropical storm Katrina, it evolved into a massive hurricane and aimed straight toward New Orleans. When Dick Cheney observed the jihadists through FISA and other means, they grew in strength and number so are now invincible. While Condoleezza Rice glanced over the IPCC report, climate change ignited the California wildfires. As Karl Rove observed the economy, poverty, homelessness, and joblessness grew to record numbers.
The article's ultimate scientifically proven conclusion: