Saturday, May 23, 2009

Don't Wait 'Til the Last Minute

The great American holiday is just around the corner. Obamas, or O-mas, is August 4th and will be here before you know it. So begin your preparations today.

Beside the traditional liberal gift giving and Halloween-like collections that are expected for the celebrations, especially for the children, there are the Obamas Eve parties and Obamas Day rituals that must be followed. It can be a hectic time, but should be used as a time of reflection and thanksgiving. That is why we here at Grandpa John's encourage early preparations.

The very best thing about this revered American holiday is that no one will ever be offended when you greet them with a hearty "Merry Obamas!" and don't have to say "Happy holidays."

In order to get you into the spirit, we will do some traditional Obamas blog-caroling:
O come, all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant,
O come ye, O come ye, to Washington.
Come and behold Him, born to save us from the Pubbie elephant;

O come, let us adore Him,
O come, let us adore Him,
O come, let us adore Him,
Obama the Lord.

A'one and a'two...
Your chestnuts roasting on an open fire
Jack Frost nipping at your nose
Global Warming carols being sung by a choir
And folks dressed up like Eskimos
A'uno y a'dos...
Feliz Navidad
Feliz Navidad
Feliz Navidad
Prospero Ano y Felicidad.

I wanna wish you a Merry Obamas
I wanna wish you a Merry Obamas
I wanna wish you a Merry Obamas
From the bottom of your wallet.
I hope this post brought you to a proper sense of early holiday cheer.

Traditional Obamas poem:
When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a gigantic coffer, and eight tiny brains here,
With the President as driver, so fashionably black,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Barack.

More rapid than pickpockets his counselors came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and call'd them by name:
"Now! Pelosi, now! Biden, now! Geithner, now Reid,,
"On! Rahm, on! Kerry, on! Ayers and Reverend Wright, indeed;

"To top the last deficit! to top the world's debt!
"Now dash away! dash away! dash away without regret!"


Mike said...

It's only right to have a national holiday for the birthday of Jeff Gordon, Roger Clemens, Barack Obama and me. Me. Me.

Steve Burri said...

Obamas is not just a national holiday, Mike, it's a spiritual awakening, a high holy day.

I'm afraid we are a little ways off from celebrating "FishersvilleMike-oween" at this time, but be patient, ya never know.