Friday, September 04, 2009

Obama to Vet Appointees More Closely

Clifton B. of Another Black Conservative claims that Green Jobs Czar, Van Jones isn't really a 'Truther,' but only plays one whenever a microphone or video recorder is in the vicinity. He also expects that Jones' tenure may mimic the Romanovs' before the weekend is up.

The TrogloPundit has wondered why I have not weighed in on the situation as of yet.

Well, Lance, take a comfy seat by the fireplace (or near where Mitchell is experimenting with the volatility of Anthropogenic methane) and I will tell you why. We here at Grandpa John's are just ahead of the curve and have been diligently working on the next big Czar Tale. Van Jones and his bus exhaust burns and thoracic tire tracks are already old news. I will clue you in to what is next.

President Obama is growing tired of his appointments being exposed in places where the sun don't even shine, so he hired me to find and vet someone with whom no one will find fault. I have run the sophisticated vetting software programs through our secret basement laboratory's super-duper computer and have found someone for the President to name as Green Jobs Czar without future embarrassment. So without further ado, I introduce to Grandpa John's readers throughout the world President Obama's faultless, uncontroversial Green Jobs Czar:

Our software reviewed all MSM reporting on Rosie over the past 25 years and could find absolutely nothing in any of it that even hints of oddities or controversy.


Left Coast Rebel said...

The dozen-donuts-downed in five minutes Czar?

Lisa said...

Why wouldn't he read something before he signed it?