Friday, September 04, 2009

The Teabagger and the Leaking Dike

Suddenly the citizen looked around him in dismay. He had not noticed that freedom's sun was setting. Now he saw that his long shadow on the grass had vanished. It was growing dark, he was still some distance from home, and in a small American town, where even the blue flowers had turned to gray. He quickened his footsteps and, with a beating heart recalled many a tale of people caught unawares in political takeovers. Just as he was bracing himself for a run, he was startled by the sound of trickling water. Whence did it come? He looked up and saw a small hole in the Constitution through which a tiny stream was flowing. Any American will shudder at the thought of a leak in the Constitution! The citizen understood the danger at a glance. That little hole, if the water were allowed to trickle through, would soon be a large one, and a terrible inundation would be the result.

Quick as a flash, he saw his duty. Throwing away his flowers, the citizen clambered up the heights until he reached the hole. His chubby little finger was thrust in, almost before he knew it. The flowing was stopped! Ah! he thought, with a chuckle of delight, the angry waters must stay back now! America shall not be drowned while I am here!

This was all very well at first, but the night was falling rapidly. Chill vapors filled the air. Our hero began to tremble with cold and dread. He shouted loudly; he screamed, 'Come here! come here!' but no one came. The cold grew more intense, a numbness, commencing in the tired little finger, crept over his hand and arm, and soon his whole body was filled with pain. He shouted again, 'Will no one come?Republicans! Patriots!' Alas, the Congress, a good, practical soul, had already locked the doors and had fully resolved to scold him on the morrow for spending the night with Conservative dreams without their permission. He tried to whistle. Perhaps some straggling politician might heed the signal, but his teeth chattered so, it was impossible.

Then he called on God for help. And the answer came, through a holy resolution: 'I will stay here till morning.' (Adapted from Hans Brinker and the Silver Skates, Chapter title A Friend in Need.)

What the teabagger is attempting to prevent:

'...a terrible inundation would be the result.'

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