Thursday, November 24, 2005

Wicked Thoughts shares some about the French.

(Disclaimer: My humor directed at the French is really directed at the political leadership and the zeitgeist emanating from the Parisian culture. It is my understanding that many Frenchmen disdain Parisians as well. Also, in most of these clever lines one could substitute 'Leftist' for 'French/France' without losing meaning or humor.)

I would rather have a German division in front of me than a French one behind me." - General George S. Patton.

Going to war without France is like going deer hunting without your accordion." - Norman Schwartzkopf.

"We can stand here like the French, or we can do something about it." - Marge Simpson

"As far as I'm concerned, war always means failure" - Jacques Chirac, President of France
"Well as far as France is concerned, you're right." - Rush Limbaugh

"You know why the French didn't want to get Saddam Hussein? Because he hates America, he loves mistresses and wears a beret. He is so French." - Conan O'Brien

"I don't know why people are surprised that France won't help us get Saddam out of Iraq. After all, France wouldn't help us get Hitler out of France either" - Jay Leno.

"The last time the French asked for 'more proof' it came marching into Paris under a German flag." - David Letterman

The only thing worse than a Frenchman is a Frenchman who lives in Canada. - Ted Nugent.

War without France would be like ... uh ... World War II. - Tom Brokaw.

"What do you expect from a culture and a nation that exerted more of its national will fighting against DisneyWorld and Big Macs than the Nazis?" - Dennis Miller.

"It is important to remember that the French have always been there when they needed us." - Alan Kent

"Somebody was telling me about the French Army rifle that was being advertised on eBay the other day -- the description was, 'Never shot. Dropped once.' - Roy Blunt

"Do you know it only took Germany three days to conquer France in WWII? And that's because it was raining." - John Xereas, Manager, DC Improv.

French Ban Fireworks at Euro Disney: The French Government announced today that it is imposing a ban on the use of fireworks at Euro Disney. The decision comes the day after a nightly fireworks display at the park, located just 30 miles outside of Paris, caused the soldiers at a nearby French Army garrison to surrender to a group of Czech tourists.

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