Friday, May 18, 2007

Beloit Blew Laws

1964 - Drinking on Sunday Approved in Beloit

On this date the Beloit City Council unanimously approved Sunday sales of alcohol by bowling alleys and restaurants. Bars and packaged good stores were still banned from selling any alcohol on Sundays. [Source: Janesville Gazette]

Someone should tell Beloiters that this was only an approval for sales, not a requirement to drink it in excess and that crack was not included in the Sunday approved sales.

The resident historians in my secret basement laboratory have discovered some interesting details about Beloit's beginnings:

In the later part of 1836, Henry Janes, a Rock River ferry operator and after whom Janesville was named, was doing a number 2 from a limb overhanging the river. A Kickapoo Indian was watching nearby. As the substance passed from rectum to river, it produced the sound, 'B'loit!'.

As the Indian wandered south, he met Caleb Blodgett, the new owner of a good portion of southern Rock County. While not totally able to understand the Indian's animated speech, he was intrigued by the term, 'B'loit' and decided to name his new town Beloit. [Source: Secret basement lab bathroom stall]

Henry Janes was so traumatized by this happenstance that in 1839 he felt compelled to flee the entire area. On October 18, 1866, the Janesville Gazette printed a letter that it received from Janes. It read, in summary:
On the 28th day of August, 1839, I bade adieu to Wisconsin, and in the fall of '49 the Pacific coast put an end to my progress toward the setting sun, and as I have never varied much from North to South my wanderings are at an end.

I have managed to keep ahead of all railroads and telegraphs, and now in my 63rd year, have never yet seen a railroad or telegraph.

Yours with respect,
H.F. Janes


tee bee said...

"and that crack was not included"

Only because it wasn't invented yet. Too bad we can't say the same about segregation and black neighborhoods.

Who made up the poo story?

Steve said...

That story has been around for as long as I can remember. Janesville and Beloit, at least when I was in school, had been bitter rivals.