Truth in Advertising

I seldom find a product label as entertaining as the 'water with vitamins' bottle that I found today:

Legally, we are prohibited from making exaggerated claims about the potency of the nutrients in this bottle. Therefore, legally we wouldn't tell you that after drinking this, Eugene from Kansas started using horseshoes as a thighmaster or that this drink gave Agnes from Delaware enough strength to bench press llamas. Heck, we can't even tell you this drink gives you the power to do a thousand pinkie push-ups... just ask Mike in Queens.

Legally, we can't say stuff like that- cause that would be wrong, you know?

Made for the Center for Responsible Hydration

For best results, stick it in the fridge.

The inside is natural, the outside is plastic.

With my late mother's voice still ringing in my ears, I pondered buying some. She would never buy pop for the household when grocery shopping, saying, "I ain't payin' money for no sugar water." She's probably rolling over in her grave about now.

Very entertaining, but, sorry, no sale. (But perhaps I should. The last time I tried, I could only do 999 pinkie push-ups [with hand claps], but I had a llama on my back who was smushing horseshoes between his thighs.)