A rare Swiss apple is being hailed in the cosmetic and fashion world as an exciting anti-ageing breakthrough – even Michelle Obama is rumoured to be a fan.
Used in creams and serums, stem cells from the Uttwiler Spätlauber apple are said to protect skin cell regeneration and so delay the onset of wrinkles.
Here, lady, eat one of these Uttwiler Spätlauber apples and rub the uneaten core over your entire body.
The Uttwiler Spätlauber is also purported to be the apple on Wilhelm Tell's son's head. Tell was clinically blind and suffering from later stages of rheumatoid arthritis at the time and could barely even pick up a bow and arrow.
UPDATE: The Swiss have long been sending Uttwiler Spätlauber apples to Arctic regions to save the polar bears. Since then, the bear population has increased four-fold.