Laws of American Civil Discourse

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Complete with corollaries:

1) Godwin's Law- As an online discussion grows longer, the probability of a comparison involving Nazis or Hitler approaches 1.

Corollary- Whoever mentioned the Nazis has automatically "lost" whatever debate was in progress.

2) Obama's Law- Whenever anyone criticizes President Obama, he/she is a racist.

Corollary- Besides, it's Bush's fault!

The New Castrati Attack Paco

Now that the 'Paco for President' juggernaut is starting to move into high gear the Progressives are trying to nip at his heals like tiny yipping chihuahuas. Any time a super stud like Paco dares step out of the mass of humanity, the new Castrati boldly attack while hiding in their basements, behind bushes, and from safely far away.








The newest cheap shot on this great American by these carrion sucking worms are inane questions about Paco's birth certificate. We will stimulate their anal sphincters to clamp down around their pencil necks as their pointy heads are forced further into their recta.

Here is a copy of Paco's full form birth certificate:

I can hear them exclaim, "See, Paco was born in Mexico and therefore is not eligible to be POTUS!"

To the contrary, Mr. Dingleberry, as you well know, that President Obama's executive order added states to bring the country's total to 57 and Mexico just happens to be one of those. Paco is in, so go back to sucking toilet water.

C.S.I.- Washington

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Episode I:

Superman Renounces U.S. Citizenship

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Doug Powers reports in MichelleMalkin.com:

Superman to Renounce US Citizenship

That's too bad! And just after he produced his birth certificate!

Liberal Local Physicians

Here's a photo of a couple of cars in a local hospital's physicians' parking lot:

President Obama's Original Full Form Birth Certificate

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I guess it's settled, then.

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Electrical Smog

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Gaia Rebels

Anybody seen Al Gore?

Secret Snack House Raid

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Robert Weissberg writes in Statists and the Racial 'Health Gap' on American Thinker:

I can already visualize the federal food police raiding local "snack houses" where obese teenagers secretly devour Ho-Hos and Ding Dongs.

If National Geographic Covered Sports

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Tribal warfare; The Bad'jer Tribe raids Hak'ai Tribal territory:

(H.T. The weeping, bitter TigerHak'ai.)

Class, Today's Quiz: Compare and Contrast the Two Major Federal Budget Plans

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(Kevin Siers, Charlotte Observer)

(H.T. Don Surber.)

With a Waffle on the Side

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(Adapted from SuperBooyah.)

Mike contracts bulimia.

(H.T. Brian Garst.)

Global Warming: MultiCulti Agreement

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Testifying before Congress- "Global Warming is the main threat to humanity."

Meade, I'm Not Giving You Permission to Take a Picture of Me

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Ann and Meade video a protester during Sarah Palin's speech in Madison, but he tries to deny permission to do so.

Getting included in a video by Ann or Meade would get you a wider viewing than a Hollywood movie.

I am a public union protester. Heil, Trumka!

Yer famous now, dude!

Wisconsin Tax Day Morning

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Seems kind of fitting somehow:

Death and taxes...

And softball practice has been canceled.

As a Lad, Mama Taught Me to Share

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The TrogloPundit also learned to share and so I will do the same.

Barney Frank in Playboy:

Sorry, Barn, I think Hugh Hefner is already taken.

Now please send The Trog some hits. I don't mean his blog. I mean go find him and hit HIM... again and again.

Pyromaniac, Meet Strawmen

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President Obama's budget speech... or any speech for that matter.

Presidential candidate Paco makes political hay (straw) out of it.

Hospital Beds and Mug Shots

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I have been working up at the local hospital this whole week. In the course of this time it seems that half the people I know are now patients there.

Then the Janesville Police Department called me downtown to look at mugshots as they thought I might have seen the perpetrators of a recent armed robbery before the fact. As I was paging through the mugshots I noticed the other half of the people I know had their portraits there.

Hmmmm.

New Bumper Sticker for 2012

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New 2012 bumper sticker adapted from Moonbattery open thread:

Union volunteers will be also asking local businesses to place one in their store windows.

The National Federation of Tornadoes Protest in Wisconsin

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MILWAUKEE, Wis (Reuters) - A powerful storm system that moved through the nation's midsection over the weekend caused what may be a record-breaking seven tornadoes in Wisconsin, officials said Monday.

And were they ever mad!

(H.T. Don Surber.)

Why a Government Shutdown Wouldn't Have Hurt Our Vacation Plans

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Dear President Obama,

We here in the Burri household are thankful that your heroic negotiating skills were able to keep the government tourist attractions open for our vacation. However, I am sorry to say that with gas prices so high we cannot afford to come visit your majestic city.

Sincerely,

Steve Burri and family

Not Just 3, But 4 Middle East Wars

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While our involvement in the wars within Iraq, Afghanistan, and Libya are serious matters, none pose a particularly great threat to the security and sovereignty of the United States itself. The fourth Middle Eastern war, however, is for our very survival of our homeland.

Although the battles may rage throughout the other regions of the country, the war itself is mainly fought in...

...the Middle East.

The Littlest Smitty

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Mr. and Mrs. Smitty are expecting!

The boy appears to be a chip off the old block:

Congratulations to the Smiths!

Instead of Complaining about High Prices, Trade In for a New One

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At a recent campaign stop in Florida, President Obama fielded a question from local citizen, Billy Bob Johnson:

Billy Bob: "Mr. President, because of the requirements of ObamaCare, our insurance company dropped all health care coverage. My wife is very sick and health care is so very expensive."

President Obama: "Billy Bob, (hee-hee), if you are complaining about high health care costs, perhaps you should trade your wife in for a new one. (giggle) Then you can really 'Drill, Baby, Drill.' (titter) 'This is the change you have been waiting for.' (guffaw)"

Althouse and Meade Discover the Future of the Madison Protest Movement

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Literally.

Can you imagine tens of thousands of protesters segwaying tirelessly around the Capitol on this technology? Surely the evil Republicans would have to relent from their Nazi tactics then!

After contacting the Governor, I was surprised to discover that they had already anticipated this movement:

Oh, well, I don't think Segways are union made anyway.

Unions, Apple Pie, Grandpa's Wisdom, Name Droppings, and Beer

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-As I consider them to be in competition, I've often wondered why the rank and file private sector union members are so supportive of public sector unions. I think that I have finally come to reasonable terms on this issue. The private unionist needs the public unionist to hand out his unemployment checks followed by his welfare benefits.

-The Liberal's credo: We have a right to a larger piece of the pie that we have labored to make smaller.

-Grandpa's cynical political druthers: "I'druther eat Republican dog food than be summoned before ObamaCare's Death Panels."

-What's in a name? 1) 'Kloppenburg': Village of dropping dung sounds. (Located just a stone's throw away from the village of Fartenburg.)  2) 'Beloit' (Wi): The sound of a turd dropping into the Rock River. 3) 'Libya': Arabic for quagmire.

-Historical note:

"You will notice that we didn't dump any beer, whiskey, or rum into Boston harbor."

Samuel Adams, Brewer and Patriot

The Public Union Tribune Front Page

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The Old Classic Reclassified

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(From Kevin Deval.)

(H.T. El Presidente.)

Maybe Pelosi Will Remain Consistent About Ryan's Budget Bill

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President Obama's Triangulation

As the Congressional Left and Right battle over numerous issues, President Obama triangulates from the White House basketball court/golf course.

Here is a geometric illustration of the circumstance:

Smitty, What is it with the Squids and Jarheads?

There's something that I've always wanted to ask Smitty. What the heck is up with the Department of the Navy entities- Navy and Marine Corps personnel?

A few years ago, I watched a TV series titled JAG. Lately I have been watching NCIS and NCIS- Los Angeles. All three of these programs show that Squids and Jarheads commit murder and other crimes at an astounding rate. What's up with that? Whatever happened to the clean cut 'Gomer Pyle' Marine Corps and 'McHale's Navy?'

Lance, Todd, and I are all Army guys. Due to the lack of TV shows claiming mayhem by soldiers, it is apparent that the law abiding service is the U.S. Army.

Just sayin'.

Alaska Gave Us the Mama Grizzly; Wisconsin Gives You the Mama Badger

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That is the sweetest ass-kicking that I have ever witnessed.

You can put lipstick on a Parrett and it'll still be a pig.

(Fox News Video H.T. theblogprof.)

White House Testing Fast Food Screening Program

The Obama Administration's Obesity Nanny Czar, Michelle Obama, is testing a new computer pre-screening program for use in America's fast food restaurants. The program will take a picture of each prospective diner, compute the caloric and nutritional content of the intended order,  generate a photograph of the diner's condition after the meal, and finally ask if the customer would like to continue with the order.

Here are some examples of the new initiative:

Before:

What are you intending to order today?

1 Big Mac, small fries, and medium Coke.

After meal:

Would you like to continue with this meal?

No, thanks!

Next, please.

Before:

What are you intending to order today?

1 Quarter Pounder, small fries, and Diet Sprite.

After meal:

Would you like to continue with this meal?

Yes, please.

Next, please.

Before:

What are you intending to order today?

Yogurt, salad, and water.

After meal:

Would you like to continue with this meal?

HELL, NO!

Apparently, there are a couple of glitches to still be worked out before this program is implemented at your local fast food restaurant.

Taxpayers' Union Local 24- ContraThuggery

The evilest Burri*, Mr. Pterodactyl, posts an opinion piece concerning the Wisconsin public union debacle.

In his post, Todd included a picture of a local business that placed one of AFSCME's posters in its front window. Well, me and a few of the Grandpa John's non-unionized employees found the place, had a few dozen beers, and replaced the sign in the window with one more appropriate.

(*In completion of the Bobel Vedere rating system, Steve of Grandpa John's is 'the good Burri,' Lance is 'the evil Burri,' and, therefore, that leaves Todd as 'the evilest Burri.')