Kenny Teddedy & The Phantom Amagirli

Kenny Teddedy wavered unsteadily on his bar stool and admired the two nearly completed pyramids of upturned shot glasses on the bar in front of him. He giggled... he knew there was really only one! He picked up another shot of scotch and threw it back and proceeded to finish another masterpiece. Since he was admitted to the state bar over 10 years previous, he was experienced enough to know that he should place the glass directly in between the two edifices that appeared before his eyes.

Kenny leaned back and nearly fell off his perch before realizing that the stool had no back and grabbed the bar to regain his position of prominence. "It took the Egyptians many years to complete something like this. And I did it in just a couple of hours," he mumbled proudly to himself. "What an accomplishment! And I did it all on my own without help from my family."

With this, Kenny's psyche became awash with the ghosts of family past. He was the youngest of nine, the fourth of four boys and he had spent his life trying to both escape and embrace the burdens placed upon him by ambitious parents as well as the long shadows cast by his brothers and a public hungry for a return to Camelfart.1

"The disadvantage of my position," he told a nearby sot, "is being constantly compared with three brothers of such superior ability."2

His neighbor looked with compassion into Kenny's face, tempered his thoughts with wisdom and calmly stated, "Yewsh gotsh a fat faish and bulboush red noshe," and did an acrobatic face plant into the bar.

Kenny's ego was little comforted by these kind words. His oldest brother died in the war testing a new technology in flight- a hero. His next oldest brother nearly died in the war when a Japanese destroyer rammed his PT boat in the middle of the night. He was eventually rescued and after returning to the states he became President of the Kiwanis Club. He was later killed by a renegade Elk- a hero.

The next brother was a little too young to get into actual combat, but was able to serve on the ship named after his oldest brother. He became sergeant-at-arms of the Kiwanis, but also was killed by rival clubber- a hero.

Kenny himself joined the Army and, following basic training at Fort Dix, he requested assignment to Fort Holabird for Army Intelligence training, but was dropped after a few weeks without explanation. He served in Paris as his dad made sure he stayed out of Korea. His dad also bought Kenny's way into the Kiwanis where he served on the very important Crucifix in Urine Committee. The rival clubs were thankful that he wasn't forced into their organizations and laughed at the Kiwanis and Kenny- a zero.

His concentration was broken when Jeri Moe Pockepny tapped him on the shoulder.

"Mr. Teddedy," she purred, "I need a ride home to work on a Kiwanis' project. Everyone else is plastered and you are just as stable as when you first came in. Could you drive me home?"

"Why, yes," Kenny slobbered, "I will take both of you home, honey. I'm a safe driver, too. Did you know that once I was in a police chase while in law school, with speeds up to 90 miles per hour, and was charged with reckless driving and driving without a license?3

"No," Jeri Moe responded, "But that must have been exciting."

"Well, let's go, baby."

Jeri Moe jumped into the passenger's seat of the swank 1967 Oldsmobile Delmont 88 as Kenny wallowed into position behind the steering wheel.

"Haaay," he bellered, "Somebody stole the steering wheel!"

"You silly goose," she giggled, "You're in the back seat. Stop playing around and let's get going."

As they did a little four-wheelin' (before four-wheelin' was cool) and approached the Dike Bridge over the Poucha Pond inlet, a strange feeling of storied déjà vu flooded over Kenny. When they began to cross the bridge Kenny looked to the side and saw the Amagirli on a collision course. There wasn't time for evasive maneuvers and after the initial chaos the Oldsmoboat soon sank into the dark depths. Kenny rounded up all the surviving crew and plotted a route to safety. He knew the Japanese controlled all the nearby larger islands so he chose to lead his crewmen to the Plum Pudding Island Hotel/Liquor Store. It wasn't until rescue the next morning that he discovered the loss of some of his PT 666 crewmen.

Kenny Teddedy died recently, the last surviving member of that memorable night on the Japanese island of Chappaquiddicki. He was preceded in death by his parents, his brothers, Jeri Moe, and his liver. In the eyes and hearts of the MSM and other liberal parrots, Kenny died as he wanted- a hero.

(All characters and incidents in this article are fictional. Any resemblance to any humanity, living or dead, is purely coincidental.)

Of Uncle Tom, Sambo, Quimbo, & Legree

Digital Publius offers an excellent short refresher course and corrects current thinking about Uncle Tom's Cabin.

Juxtaposition

Lance shouts, "Extra! Extra! Assembly targets drunken drivers! Read all about it!"

The Lion of Leinenkugel

It's not satire. It's IowaHawk!

La Crosse WI -- Slowly filing past a green-and-gold casket festooned with cheese curds, lottery tickets, and bouquets of 6-pack rings, the city of La Crosse bid a tearful farewell this morning to Norman V. "Norm" Snitker, 62. Long heralded as the "Lion of Leinenkugel" for his relentless fight for free beer and shots at local taverns and supper clubs, Snitker succumbed to an exploding liver Tuesday evening during a late model modified heat at La Crosse Speedway's $1 Jagermeister night.

"Norm left an amazing legacy, and an amazing bar tab," said mourner Les Schreindl, 59. "La Crosse won't see his likes again soon."[...]

At the packed memorial service, Pastor Ed Vos urged mourners to remember the full measure of their fallen friend.

"Whatever his endless shortcomings were as a human being, we cannot let a few DUIs, cheese entombments and arson episodes overshadow the many good things that Norm thought he did," said Vos. "Let us all recognize that Norm stood up for what he thought was right. No matter whether it was really right or not, and no matter how blotto he was. I suppose we all have to respect a man who can maintain that kind of fierce moral clarity. And can hold his liquor like that."

Global Warming

Shortly into the second quarter of the Packer/Cardinal exhibition game it happened:

An Ariens Snow Thrower commercial.

Well, it is August 28th.

To us it's like the swallows returning to San Juan Capistrano...

The buzzards returning to Hinckley, Ohio.

Hey, look. Farm & Fleet has some hot deals on ice fishing gear! I could use some new tip-ups.

A Question of the Survival of This System

These two videos of an interview with defector Yuri Bezmenov go back to back. They must have taken place during the early years of the Reagan Presidency. They dovetail perfectly with this post.





(H.T. The Blog Prof.)

White House Condescension

The Chicago Way- They come at you with legitimate questions, you crap all over 'em.

(Photo credit- Moonbattery)

A Liberal Defending Obama's Policies to Me

(Photo credit: turbo12acer)

(H.T. Bluegrass Pundit.)

Patriotic Holder Tough on Enemies

(H.T. An Ol' Broad's Ramblings.)

Headline of the Day

From Chicks On The Right:

Democrats Get Mad When Rush Limbaugh Is Right.
This Is Why Democrats Are Always Mad.

All Wee-Weed Up Over Mandated Circumcision

New York Times:

Public health officials are considering promoting routine circumcision for all baby boys born in the United States to reduce the spread of H.I.V., the virus that causes AIDS.1

Ed Morrisey on Hot Air:

Barack Obama has warned us of Tonsil Vultures and Foot Rustlers. So far, he hasn’t issued a warning on Foreskin Fiends...

Why should the CDC push circumcision at all? The government has no business being in the middle of that decision.2

Rush Limbaugh:

Leave our penises alone, too, Obama!3

R.S. McCain:

Grab a cup of STFU, you foreskin-fascinated freaks! By your folly you are in danger of inciting wrath such as befell the residents Shalem, when Shechem the son of Hamor the Hivite offended Levi and Simeon by shamefully mistreating their sister, Jacob and Leah's daughter Dinah.4

Cassandra on Villainous Company:

Opening sally:

"KEEP YOUR LAWS OFF MY ROD!"

What???

You expected something substantive from me? It's nearly Friday.
Don't be a weiner. Do your wurst.5

Now even the international community has weighed in:

"Leave our heads alone!"

The Milwaukee Brewer Racing Sausages:
#1, Brett Wurst Austro-Bavarian.
#2, Stosh Jonjak is Polish.
#3, Guido is an Italian
#4, Frankie Furter is an American hot dog.
#5, Cinco (or Paco) is Mexican.

Death Panels

Rationing Panels

"Vague promises of savings from cutting waste, enhancing prevention and wellness, installing electronic medical records and improving quality of care are merely 'lipstick' cost control, more for show and public relations than for true change."

"Medical school education and post graduate education emphasize thoroughness. This culture is further reinforced by a unique understanding of professional obligations, specifically the Hippocratic Oath's admonition to 'use my power to help the sick to the best of my ability and judgment' as an imperative to do everything for the patient regardless of cost or effect on others."

...that medical students should be trained "to provide socially sustainable, cost-effective care." One sign of progress he sees: "the progression in end-of-life care mentality from 'do everything' to more palliative care shows that change in physician norms and practices is possible."

"In the next decade every country will face very hard choices about how to allocate scarce medical resources. There is no consensus about what substantive principles should be used to establish priorities for allocations."

"We had a big controversy in the United States when there was a limited number of dialysis machines. In Seattle, they appointed what they called a 'God committee' to choose who should get it, and that committee was eventually abandoned. Society ended up paying the whole bill for dialysis instead of having people make those decisions."

"Substantively, it suggests services that promote the continuation of the polity—those that ensure healthy future generations, ensure development of practical reasoning skills, and ensure full and active participation by citizens in public deliberations—are to be socially guaranteed as basic. Covering services provided to individuals who are irreversibly prevented from being or becoming participating citizens are not basic, and should not be guaranteed. An obvious example is not guaranteeing health services to patients with dementia."

Etc., etc., etc.

The quotes and many more are attributed to the writings and speeches of Dr. Ezekiel Emanuel, health-policy adviser at the Office of Management and Budget and a member of the Federal Council on Comparative Effectiveness Research in the Obama Administration.

(H.T. Pundit & Pundette.)

Babes in the Woods

Hunter: "We've been hunting all day and ain't seen nothin'."

Leah: "Guys... S-s-something just licked my hand!"

Izzy: "Did you fart or was that a buck snort?"

The Content of the Character of Your Economic Beliefs

Bill Frezza questions your faith in Real Clear Markets through a true/false test with essay questions.

Examples:

Would you ever use the ballot box to force others to practice your religion or make them pay to build you a church? Why do you find it easy to do this with your economic beliefs, compelling others to foot the bill for the public policies you promote?

Do you admire highly paid sports figures yet disdain highly compensated business executives? Why? Does it matter whether the shareholders in the companies that employ these executives feel they are getting their money's worth? And if you're not a shareholder, what makes this issue your concern?

Does every poor person have a moral claim on every rich person regardless of how they got rich or poor?

Is making all people equally poor an acceptable solution to inequality?

Would you steal money from your own children? Would you steal money from other people's children? What makes it socially acceptable to let Congress do this for you?

Do you contribute to charity? Would you gang up with your neighbors and force others to contribute to your charities? What makes it OK to hire Congress to do this for you?

Do your ends always justify your means?

Are you happy to see the state to which we've fallen - pressure group pitted against pressure group, old against young, citizen against citizen all fighting to grab a share of the swelling portion of our national income funneled through the hands of Congress? What other outcome would you expect when moral foundations crumble?

There are 56 questions in the body of the text. Please take your time and answer them carefully. But hurry, the 2010 elections will be here soon.

(H.T. The Discerning Texan.)

Wake Up & Smell the Parochial Clichés

In Conservative circles, it is common to hear or read that President Obama is a Socialist, a radical, a Fascist, an anti-capitalist, and/or anti-American. I have no problem with that and often refer to him and his in that light myself. Moreover, I consider him incredibly shallow intellectually, naive in thought, and inexperienced or willfully in denial of real world realities.

Writing a 3 part series in Pajamas Media, Oleg Atbashian reminds us of some basic historical realities that have long been ignored by the MSM, education, and the American elite. Atbashian has seen life from both sides. He has been in the U.S. since 1994, but lived most of his life in the Soviet Ukraine.

These three articles serve as a valuable reminder to things that we all know, but are lost in most of the political/ideological rhetoric that is exchanged among us.

The first in Atbashian's series is titled Obama Regresses to Cold War Mythology … and Switches Sides.

Excerpt:

The same people who chanted the mantra of “change” are having a hard time noticing the real change happening in the world today. Apparently, in their view, any change that contradicts the above template is either not happening, in which case it’s a fabrication of imperialist propaganda, or being forced on the world against its wishes, in which case the perpetrator can only be the criminal, capitalist cabal at the heart of American imperialism with its long and ruthless arm of the CIA. Any mention of oil or gas in this context becomes undeniable proof of this theory.

In this sense, Obama’s notion of “change” is not change at all, but rather a regression to a mythological past, which impedes the real change the world so desperately needs.

The second article is Obama’s Quest into the Magic World of Anti-American Mythology.

How many of you, upon hearing about an overthrow of a leftist dictator, instinctively thought of a CIA plot?

How many, at least at some point in your lives, believed that aggressive U.S. meddling ignited hot spots on the world map? That any pro-U.S. leader of a small country is probably a CIA puppet? That the American model of individual liberty and capitalism was being imposed on the people of Latin America, Asia, Eastern Europe, and the Middle East against their will, and they might be happier with leftist tyrants?

These are the attitudes leftist propaganda is designed to create — but they may also be the result of an elitist presumption that people of the world cannot think for themselves and have no room in their souls for individual ambitions and achievements outside of what the government is giving them. Short of stating it explicitly, elitism implies that “the masses” are mindless, spiritless creatures without free will, always in need of the largesse of the state, and for their own good the state ought to nationalize the country’s resources in order to feed its subjects.

There is a reason why snobby elites on the Upper East Side of Manhattan generously donate to leftist causes and support leftist politicians. Snobs and radicals often act in accord because they are not opposites, as some believe, but rather spiritual cousins — equally despising “the bourgeois,” sharing a low view of humanity as herd animals, and sorting people not on their individual merits but by color, income, occupation, ethnicity, gender, and any other characteristic except the content of their minds. Such beliefs have often served as a veiled excuse for tyranny...

First of all, one cannot maintain intellectual and moral integrity while decrying U.S. presence in the hot spots of the Cold War, if one does not also mention the presence in the same hot spots of the Soviet espionage agencies, the KGB and the GRU. Their job was to initiate the hot spots and then fan the flames, spreading the fire to the rest of the world. The U.S. objectives were quite the opposite — to extinguish or at least to localize the fire — which made American involvement a necessary if often inadequate antidote.

To blame the hot spots on the U.S. presence would be as insane as to blame fires on firefighters because their trucks are always at the scene...

Having come here from the USSR — a country whose government invented this strategy and lived by it — I was astonished by the abundance of leftist propagandistic clichés in the American mainstream media. The exclusion of the Soviet connection in any discussion of America’s culpability is one of such clichés. It is a telltale sign of a prefabricated myth.

Where’s the “imperialist propaganda” when you need it? The leftist propaganda encountered so little resistance in the land of the alleged “capitalist conspiracy” that an airbrushed version of history has almost universally replaced the truth in the media, education, and entertainment. The intended result is the widespread notion of America’s guilt. One doesn’t even need to be a leftist anymore to believe in this country’s image as a violent empire controlled by greedy capitalist oligarchies that dictate its policies.

Altbashian's third article is A U.S. President, Raised on KGB Propaganda.

It would be absurd to presume that people of the world go to bed every night loving dictators and hating the United States. Obviously, the first conscious thing on the mind of a European, an African, or an Asian as they wake up in the morning is not how to survive another day of “America’s economic and cultural imperialism.” And since anti-Americanism is incompatible with common sense that guides our daily lives, people must be reminded of it every day to keep it alive. That is the burden that radical intellectuals have taken upon themselves, dispensing daily quotas of leftist clichés to the “unwashed masses” down below...

The fraudulent image of America as the “violent imperialist aggressor” was picked up by the Western media, disseminated through activist groups, and found its way into policy making, exemplified by John Kerry’s 1971 “Genghis Khan” testimony before the Senate Committee on Foreign Relations, where Kerry almost verbatim repeated the KGB fabrications, later recognized by Pacepa as his own subversive product...

This is how Pacepa [the highest ranking of a number of defectors from the Eastern Bloc intelligence agencies] remembers it:

During my last meeting with Andropov, he said, wisely, “now all we have to do is to keep the Vietnam-era anti-Americanism alive.” Andropov was a shrewd judge of human nature. He understood that in the end our original involvement would be forgotten, and our insinuations would take on a life of their own. He knew well that it was just the way human nature worked.

Andropov’s strategy must still be working if even today Barack Obama believes in these insinuations strongly enough to apologize before the world for the perceived history of “American arrogance.”

The Soviet Union may have self-destructed in 1991, but the seeds of intellectual deception it had planted gave such a bountiful crop that seventeen years later America has elected a leader who is guided by received notions designed to subdue and destroy this country. Apparently, the rumors about America’s victory in the Cold War appear to have been greatly exaggerated.

Please read these articles to remind yourself of the realities of the world before "Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall."

(Oleg Abashian is also the instigator of The People's Cube.)

(H.T. Dissecting Leftism.)

Kennedy Wooed by Packers

WTMJ.com:

Had Ted Kennedy given a different response to a letter from a Packers head coach, it's possible Senator Ted Kennedy may have become Packers receiver Ted Kennedy.

The senator's web site says that Kennedy, a senior right end for the Harvard football team in 1955, received a letter from Packers head coach Lisle Blackbourn.

As head coach for the Green Bay Packers, Blackbourn managed only a 17-31-0 record from 1954-57 with no playoff appearances. He resigned at the end of the 1957 season after a disappointing 3-9-0 campaign.1

The Packers dodged a bullet.

Two Out of Three Ain't Bad

SUGAR CREEK, MO

- Bowling a perfect 300 is always impressive. But doing it after you just hit a hole in one on a golf course is nothing short of amazing. In fact, as far as anyone can tell, it's never been done. Until now, that is.

The third? He bought a Powerball ticket- Fail.

(H.T. Lucianne.com.)

Born to Be V.P. of A.F.R.C.

A timber trade association is appealing a harvest planned for the Shasta-Trinity National Forest, saying the project doesn't clear enough trees to improve forest health and lower fire danger.

"This is not something that we do very often. It has to be a pretty extreme situation for us to feel that the project just isn't meeting the purpose and need."- Anne Forest Burns, vice president of the American Forest Resource Council.

(H.T. Commonsense & Wonder.)

"Barack's Now the Last Brother"

Now the scandal involves the question of whether Barack was born in Kenya, Hawaii, or Massachusetts.

Texas Crop Circles

Aliens Join Tea Party Movement

(H.T. Lucianne.com.)

Edward Moore Kennedy, 1932-2009

Long time Massachusetts Senator Edward Kennedy died yesterday of brain cancer. I wish to offer my condolences to his family and to those who loved him.

The man now stands before his Maker without the press or aides spinning the story of his life. (For the atheists: The man now is being prepared as food for worms.)

Since it may not be the appropriate time to speak of what I actually thought of the man, as many consider it bad form to speak ill of the dead, I will simply observe a moment of silence.
-
-
-
-

However, it is not bad form to speak ill of what those, his supporters and similar thinkers are saying, have said, or possibly might say in his memory. The Liberal Lion...

'...would still be alive if ObamaCare had been passed before the Congressional recess.'

'...would still be alive if the government had more regulation of distilleries.'

'...would still be alive if Gore and Kerry would not have had their elections stolen from them by George W. Bush, the Supreme Court, and cheater voting machines.'

'...would, if she had lived, Mary Jo Kopechne would be 62 years old. Through his tireless work as a legislator, Edward Kennedy would have brought comfort to her in her old age...'1

'...the greatest senator of the 20th century.'1

'...sent shivers up my leg.'

'...his embrace of Obama was the passing of the torch to the last Kennedy brother.2'

(H.T.'s The Blog Prof & NewsBusters.)

The Deep Waters of Racism

Representative Maxine Waters disses Neanderthal-Americans.

I don't think Ms. Waters likes your kind, Lance.

(H.T.'s Sister Toldjah & The Daley Gator.)

Besides Being an UnAmerican Nazi Mobster...

I am also a proud Malignant Ecotumor!

Dr? Warren Hern, one of the few late-term abortion providers in the country has stated:

"The human species is an example of a malignant ecotumor, an uncontrolled proliferation of a single species that threatens the existence of other species in their habitats."1

...a malignant lesion,...2

Keith Olbermann named Hern "Best Person in the World" on August 6.3

The full Newsbusters article is here.

(H.T. Don Surber.)

More Proof that Conservatives Are Racist

Portraying the Caucasoid Congressman David Obey, D-WI(17), in 'blackface' is surely racist.

TrogloPundit Credited with Inventing Humor

Frank J. on IMAO credits The TrogloPundit for starting the first joke. This schtick was copied and altered to that at which we giggle, chuckle, and guffaw to this day.

Anyway, my theory is that all jokes are stolen from some knock-knock joke a caveman told thousands of years ago.

Thanks, Trog.



As noted on an earlier post that the TrogFather is also credited with the first Rule 5 posting.

Practical High Tech

Here's a new product that every American male should get:



(H.T. Wicked Thoughts.)

The Defiling Excrement is Human

In associating two articles and a series of video discussions, one could easily draw further inferences.

The first article is titled The Devil's Excrement written by Moises Naim. In a way it attempts to blame the abundance of natural resources such as oil or valuable mineral deposits to the lack of progress in third world countries. Although it seems counter-intuitive, history shows that it has happened with great regularity.

One key paragraph in the article gives some explanation.

Once in power, oil-rich governments are deadly hard to dislodge. They stick around by spending their vast public resources to buy out or repress their political opponents. Statistically, it is far less probable that an authoritarian oil country will transition to democracy than that a resource-poor autocracy will. Oil-rich governments spend two to 10 times more on their militaries than countries without oil and are more prone to go to war. Most oil-exporting countries that do not have strong democratic institutions before they start exporting crude inevitably create an inhospitable environment for democracy.

The series of 5 videos is from the Uncommon Knowledge archive at NRO. In this portion of Mr. Robinson's neighborhood, he interviews Dambisa Moyo. Ms. Moyo argues against the wisdom of all the foreign aid given to African nations over the past decades. She could have written the above quote and substituted 'foreign aid' in the place of 'oil' and drawn a similar conclusion.

The second article, written by Tsegaye Tadesse, is titled 'Africa wants $67 bln a year in global warming funds.' African leaders are putting a guilt trip on wealthier nations in order to squeeze even more aid from them; International entitlement.

What strikes me as so familiar in these productions is that it so reminds me of the Obama Administration/Democrat controlled Congress. Slight adjustments to the above 'Excrement' quote yield:

Once in power, Liberal-rich governments are deadly hard to dislodge. They stick around by spending their vast public resources to buy out or repress their political opponents. Statistically, it is far less probable that an authoritarian Liberal country will transition to democracy than even a resource-poor autocracy will. Power-rich governments spend two to 10 times more on their militant base than countries without Democrat control and are more prone to go to fascist. Most Democrat controlled countries that do not have strong democratic institutions before they start promoting policies that inevitably create an inhospitable environment for democracy.

Perhaps Barack Obama was not born in Kenya, but his policies more highly resemble those of modern African leaders than Constitutionally based American ones.

Obama's Artistic Inspiration

There has been quite a bit of speculation on what makes President Obama tick. His personal history suggests a great deal of basic inspiration from Karl Marx, Jeremiah Wright, William Ayers, Saul Alinsky, and Louis Farrakhan. But I also believe that the President took inspiration from Malvina Reynolds in his vision for American culture:

Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes made of ticky tacky,
Little boxes on the hillside,
Little boxes all the same.
There's a green one and a pink one
And a blue one and a yellow one,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

And the people in the houses
All went to the university,
Where they were put in boxes
And they came out all the same,
And there's doctors and lawyers,
And business executives,
And they're all made out of ticky tacky
And they all look just the same.

President Obama must have heard the Beatles, too, in his vision for ObamaCare:

When I get older losing my hair,
Many years from now.
Will you still be sending me a valentine
Birthday greetings bottle of wine.

If I'd been out till quarter to three
Would you lock the door,
Will you still need me, will you still feed me,
When I'm sixty-four.

Our President has drawn inspiration from a wide variety of sources. We, the people, need to listen to him carefully, become inspired, laugh him off, and vote Conservative.

Blog Party Protest

The UnAmerican Nazi Mobsters Continue Their Protests Online

Earliest TrogloPundit Blog Post Found

The TrogloPundit has been blogging long before blogging was cool. Here is the story of a discovery from his early Rule 5 archives.

Was It a Mistake at All?

The Los Angeles Top of the Ticket blog reports a correction made in its newspaper:

Here is an actual correction from Page A4 of today's print edition:

FOR THE RECORD

TV listings: The Prime-Time TV grid in Thursday's Calendar section mistakenly listed MTV's "Jackass" show on the MSNBC cable schedule at 7 and 10 p.m. where instead MSNBC's "Countdown With Keith Olbermann" should have been listed.

It's not the Worst Mistake in the World.

But without this kind of correction, online too, a few thousand people might have tuned into MSNBC, the Obama administration's favorite cable channel, expecting to see a "Jackass" show, and instead they'd have found Olbermann.

Worse, what if nobody noticed the difference?

(H.T. TigerHawk from Villainous Company.)

The Audacity of the UnAmerican, Nazi Mobsters

Adam Sandler in Knoxville?
Via Instapundit

Lennon & McCartney Explain Obama & Democrats

In 1969 the Beatles produced a song that explains today's Democrat Congress led by the charismatic Barack Obama. I believe it was on the album titled 'Obama Road.'It explains the antics of the legislative and executive branches and tells how they will return America to its proper place within the community of nations:

Here come old flattop, he come grooving up slowly.
He got joo-joo eyeball, he one holy roller.
He got hair down to his knee.
Got to be a joker, he just do what he please.

He wear no shoeshine, he got toe-jam football.
He got monkey finger, he shoot coca-cola.
He say, "I know you, you know me."
One thing I can tell you is you got to be free.
Come together right now over me.

He bag production, he got walrus gumboot.
He got Ono sideboard, he one spinal cracker.
He got feet down below his knee.
Hold you in his armchair, you can feel his disease.
Come together right now over me.

He roller-coaster, he got early warning.
He got muddy water, he one mojo filter.
He say, "One and one and one is three."
Got to be good-looking 'cause he's so hard to see.
Come together right now over me.

This simplifies Democrat politics and makes so much sense that once we Conservatives can get a handle on this we, too, will come together with the Democrats and join them in singing Kumbaya and stop being so 'wee weed up'.

It's Monday night. Are you ready for some toe-jam football?

Politicians: We Must Keep Others Honest

Thomas Sowell state an obvious Obamirony:

Obama even gets away with saying things like having a system to "keep insurance companies honest"-- and many people may not see the painful irony in politicians trying to keep other people honest.

Wisconsin Is #1

In the World
In 'Sweet Revenge'

According to the TruTV Crime Library 30% of the world's top 'Sweet Revenge' incidents took place in Wisconsin.

China garnered 20%.

Indiana got 10%.

England had 10%.

Florida, 10%.

Scotland, 10%.

Washington State, 10%.

We're #1... We're #1.

Let this be a warning to some certain individuals that would come lookin' fer some trouble here. Yeah, that means you, Brett Favre. Be careful of your lovely Gator skin, GatorDoug. And Pat, remember that a fine L.S.U. Tigerskin rug would look quite spiffy on my living room floor.

Everybody in Washington Gets All Wee Weed Up

President Obama stated in an off-the-cuff State of the Union message:

"There is something about August going into September where everybody in Washington gets all wee weed up!"

There have been a lot of lame attempts to translate 'wee weed up' into a coherent meaning. Some claim it means to be pissed off. Others aver that it means wetting themselves, and others that it refers to 'this little piggie' going wee, wee, wee all the way home.

The true meaning, however, is none of the above. The first difficulty is that the phrase has been wrongly transcribed. The correct phrase is actually 'we weed up.' In Harvardese Ebonic parlance this means 'we really get stoned.'

Around the Harvard campus one often hears a conversation such as this:

"Yo, Dog."

"What up, Homeboy?"

"We weed up, bee-otch."

"Word to yo mutha!"

Obama is informing us that everybody in Washington is stoned to the max during late August and early September. Americans living outside the beltway or don't have a Liberal Arts Degree from Harvard can't tell the difference, so we appreciate the heads up.

(UPDATE: It seems as though I have been disseminating the new 'Pelican Brief'. I have been flagged. My life may be in danger.)

"One lone blogger has stumbled upon the truth. An investigative MSM journalist wants his story and, like everybody else, wants him dead."

(UPDATE 2: Lance may be in danger, too. He has published the TrogloBrief.)

Farve Signs with Sears

Brett Favre does a commercial for Sears and it's very good. He has a hard time making up his mind whether or not to buy a TV. This video is of some outtakes during its making.

Truth in Advertising

Dad29 tells a story about Carnation holding a contest for an advertising pitch.

Here is a notable entry:

A similar contest should be held for ObamaCare:

"I Am My Brother's Keeper"

President Obama speaks to a coalition of religious leaders:

These are all fabrications that have been put out there in order to discourage people from meeting what I consider to be a core ethical and moral obligation. That is that we look out for one other, that I am my brother's keeper, I am my sister's keeper. And in the wealthiest nation on earth right now, we are neglecting to live up to that call.1

The phrase 'my brother's keeper' is derived from Genesis 4:8,9.

"Cain spoke to Abel his brother. And when they were in the field, Cain rose up against his brother Abel and killed him. Then the LORD said to Cain, "Where is Abel your brother?" He said, "I do not know; am I my brother's keeper?'"

Cain's question is most often interpreted to be a selfish denial of his responsibility to be his brother's keeper. To the contrary, however, Cain had actually presumed to be his brother's keeper. He considered Abel's life to be under his authority, to be given or taken at his pleasure. Cain had taken and swallowed the bait of temptation just as his mother, Eve, had done when she chose to act upon the claim, 'You will be be like God.'

In more modern times, the seductive lure of being like God changes only in outward rhetoric. It nonetheless remains as Solomon stated so long ago, "There is nothing new under the sun."

Barack Obama considers himself to be his brother's keeper. The Hebrew word translated in Genesis 4:9 is שׁמר (sha-mar), most often used in reference to a herdsman, a vine dresser, or a prison warden. Of course these 'keepers' oversee every aspect of the lives within the herd, flock, vineyard, or prison. In Psalm 121:5, שׁמר is also used to describe God's keeping of mankind. Obama sees himself with the federal government to stand in this place.

Back in 2007, I wrote a post on Jawbone of an Ass that describes what we are seeing in modern Progressives like Obama:

One 'academic scribbler from a few years back' causing wannabe 'madmen in authority to distill their frenzy' is Julian Huxley. In his essay, 'Transhumanism' published in New Bottles for New Wine in 1957, Huxley purported to be like God, albeit in more sophisticated, yet nevertheless thinly veiled terms:

As a result of a thousand million years of evolution, the universe is becoming conscious of itself, able to understand something of its past history and its possible future. This cosmic self-awareness is being realized in one tiny fragment of the universe-- in a few of us human beings.[italics mine][...]

It is as if man had been suddenly appointed managing director of the biggest business of all, the business of evolution-- appointed without being asked if he wanted it, and without proper warning and preparation. What is more, he can't refuse the job. Whether he wants to or not, whether he is conscious of what he is doing or not, he is in point of fact determining the future direction of evolution on this earth. That is his inescapable destiny, and the sooner he realizes it and starts believing in it, the better for all concerned.

What the job really boils down to is this-- the fullest realization of man's possibilities, whether by the individual, by the community, or by the species in its processional adventure along the corridors of time.[...]

The world's unrest is largely due to this new belief... The unrest will produce some unpleasant consequences before it is dissipated; but it is in essence a beneficent unrest, a dynamic force which will not be stilled until it has laid the physiological foundations of human destiny.[italics mine][...]

We are already justified in the conviction that human life as we know it in history is a wretched makeshift, rooted in ignorance; and that it could be transcended by a state of existence based on the illumination of knowledge and comprehension,[...]

We shall start from new premises. For instance, that beauty (something to enjoy and something to be proud of) is indispensable, and therefore that ugly or depressing towns are immoral; that quality of people not mere quantity, is what we must aim at, and therefore that a concerted policy is required to prevent the present flood of population-increase from wrecking all our hopes for a better world;[...]

It is only a small wonder that Progressive politicians are distilling their frenzy from this academic scribbler's voice in the air. It has always been seductive to view yourself as God, not only over your own life, but also over the lives of others. It is certain, they say, that we are our brother's keeper.

The intended answer to Cain's question is, "No, I am my brother's brother. LORD, you are my brother's keeper, as well as mine."

Grandbaby Town Hall

Izzy: "The national debt that President Obama is leaving to my generation makes me drool uncontrollably."

Hunter: "Yeah, it makes me want to jab this plastic spoon into my eye."



Izzy: "Hunter, is that YOU I smell? Whew! Please get your Mommy to change you!"

Hunter: "Nah, it's not me. It's Grandpa Steve over there. He ate one of those burritos for lunch again."

Rule 4 Action; Some Subtle, Some not so Subtle

Robert Stacy McCain is often busied attacking or counter-attacking those who attempt to belittle him or other Conservatives. Here he takes on David Frum. The sparring is right in the center of the ring.

But sometimes, McCain knows that he is biting off more than he can chew. So even though he tried to be subtle, my discerning eye caught this one right off. The target of the attack did as well. Here Stacy takes a pot shot at The TrogloPundit:

Well, you see how this disturbing pattern of pathology ineluctably progresses to the point where grown men actually care about the film adaptations of space fantasy novels.

Am I the only one who sees this whole cluster of behaviors, centered around the telltale abnormal interest in fictionalized distant worlds and/or ancient times, as constituting something that might be called Total Geek Syndrome?

Not only is this an attack on Lance, but also his twin brother.

Perhaps McCain hoped that he could jab this low blow unnoticed. After all, Todd and Lance total almost 13 feet tall while pushing nearly 500 pounds of twisted steel and sex appeal.

Lance noticed. And the TrogloPundit sent a not so subtle return message in answer to Stacy right in the post title.

Maybe I should volunteer to write R.S. McCain’s obituary.

Careful, Stacy, you have a family and loads of readers to think about.

McCain's blog motto is 'Hits is hits.' But I don't think this is what he is talking about.

Anthropocentric Governmental Warming

Causing a New Dust Bowl?

(H.T. Ol' Broad's Ramblings.)

Favre Jerseys Flying Off the Shelves

Cost: 30 Pieces of Silver

Favre to Sign with Vikings Today?

If he passes his physical, he will sign today and practice this afternoon?

Favre inspired shoes: Insulated flip-flops.

War Without Bush Is not a War at All

Byron York writing in the Washington Examiner titles this article "For the Left, war without Bush is not war at all.

Remember the anti-war movement?...

As part of a straw poll done at the convention [Netroots Nation], the Democratic pollster Stanley Greenberg presented participants with a list of policy priorities like health care and the environment. He asked people to list the two priorities they believed "progressive activists should be focusing their attention and efforts on the most." The winner, by far, was "passing comprehensive health care reform." In second place was enacting "green energy policies that address environmental concerns."

And what about "working to end our military involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan"? It was way down the list, in eighth place.

Perhaps more tellingly, Greenberg asked activists to name the issue that "you, personally, spend the most time advancing currently." The winner, again, was health care reform. Next came "working to elect progressive candidates in the 2010 elections." Then came a bunch of other issues. At the very bottom -- last place, named by just one percent of participants -- came working to end U.S. involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Cindy Sheehan remains consistent, however.

Perhaps Neville Chamberlain was ultimately right. There is now peace in our time.

(H.T. Dissecting Leftism.)

Rule 5 Submission- Pity Entry

Russia's Yelena Isinbayeva, 2 time Olympic champion, 2 time World champion, and World record holder in Women's pole vault, choked in this year's Championships in Berlin. In her 3 attempts she cleared zero meters, which translates to zero feet, zero inches in the English system of measurement. This was so shocking it was considered analogous to Usain Bolt missing the podium in the 100 meter dash.

To console the disappointed Yelena, we here at Grandpa John's have decided to lift her spirits by offering her as our Rule 5 entry for this week:

Yelena Isinbayeva

Don't Sweat the Small Stuff, Just Give Me the Power

Even The New York Times wonders why President Obama has yet to appoint an administrator to lead the Centers for Medicare and Medicaid Services.

“The vacancy stands out like a sore thumb,” said Dr. Denis A. Cortese, president of the Mayo Clinic, often cited by the White House as a health care model...

“Under a strong administrator, it could take the lead in making major changes in the health care delivery system, so we’d get better outcomes and better service at lower cost.”

Methinks the President cares not about the specifics of Health Care Reform, but only in having the power to control it.

'Cause Palin Weighs Their Corpses Down with Rocks

Bill Steigerwald explains how he knows that polar bears aren't drowning from the melting of Arctic ice:

Because if even just one emaciated drowned polar bear's body had been fished from Arctic waters in the last five years, we'd have seen its sorry carcass a thousand times on TV and on the covers of Time and Vanity Fair.

By now the poor dead bear would have been given a trademarked first name, marketed as the official victim of Exxon Mobil-caused climate change and starred in three Pixar movies.

But he still gets a newsletter from the Natural Resources Defense Council:

With six pages of exclamation points, underlined sentences, boldfaced type fonts and apocalyptic predictions about imminent planetary and polar bear doom, it looked like a direct-mail parody when I first pulled it from my mailbox the first week of August.

It was the real thing, however.

The U.S. Navy Understands Obama's Hope & Change

I haven't abused Grandpa Jerry lately, so, via Don Surber:

Change

There’s an old sea story in the Navy about a ship’s Captain who inspected his sailors, and afterward told the Chief Mate that his men smelled bad. The Captain suggested perhaps it would help if the sailors would change underwear occasionally.

The Chief responded, “Aye, aye sir, I’ll see to it immediately!”

The Chief went straight to the sailors berth deck and announced, “The Captain thinks you guys smell bad and wants you to change your underwear. Pittman, you change with Jones; McCarthy, you change with Witkowski; and Brown, you change with Schultz. Now get to it!!!”

THE MORAL: Someone may be promising “Change” in Washington; but don’t count on things smelling any better.

Well, the Town's Name is Dickeyville, Isn't It?

A news article in the Times Herald of Dubuque, IA:

A Dickeyville, Wis., woman had an unpleasant surprise waiting in her shed Wednesday afternoon: a naked man.

Alverna Haverland called the Grant County Sheriff's Department after she saw someone inside a shed in the yard of her Main Street home.

A deputy arrived to discover a naked homeless man in the shed.

The deputy stood by while the man collected his belongings and got dressed.

The man was last seen walking toward St. Petersburg.

ObamaCare: Streamlined and Money Saving

Via Right Soup:

Here’s what the Democrat’s health care bill will create to further cement the Federal governments death-grip on We The People.

1. Health Benefits Advisory Committee (Section 123, p. 30)
2. Health Choices Administration (Section 141, p. 41)
3. Qualified Health Benefits Plan Ombudsman (Section 144, p. 47)
4. Program of administrative simplification (Section 163, p. 57)
5. Retiree Reserve Trust Fund (Section 164(d), p. 70)
6. Health Insurance Exchange (Section 201, p. 72)
7. Mechanism for insurance risk pooling to be established by Health Choices Administration Commissioner (Section 206(b), p. 106)
8. Special Inspector General for the Health Insurance Exchange (Section 206(c), p. 107)
9. Health Insurance Exchange Trust Fund (Section 207, p. 109)
10. State-based Health Insurance Exchanges (Section 208, p. 111)
11. “Public Health Insurance Option” (Section 221, p. 116)
12. Ombudsman for “Public Health Insurance Option” (Section 221(d), p. 117)
13. Account for receipts and disbursements for “Public Health Insurance Option” (Section 222(b), p. 119)
14. Telehealth Advisory Committee (Section 1191, p. 380)
15. Demonstration program providing reimbursement for “culturally and linguistically appropriate services” (Section 1222, p. 405)
16. Demonstration program for shared decision making using patient decision aids (Section 1236, p. 438)
17. Accountable Care Organization pilot program (Section 1301, p. 443)
18. Independent patient-centered medical home pilot program under Medicare (Section 1302, p. 462)
19. Community-based medical home pilot program under Medicare (Section 1302(d), p. 468)
20. Center for Comparative Effectiveness Research (Section 1401(a), p. 502)
21. Comparative Effectiveness Research Commission (Section 1401(a), p. 505)
22. Patient ombudsman for comparative effectiveness research (Section 1401(a), p. 519)
23. Quality assurance and performance improvement program for skilled nursing facilities (Section 1412(b)(1), p. 546)
24. Quality assurance and performance improvement program for nursing facilities (Section 1412 (b)(2), p. 548)
25. Special focus facility program for skilled nursing facilities (Section 1413(a)(3), p. 559)
26. Special focus facility program for nursing facilities (Section 1413(b)(3), p. 565)
27. National independent monitor pilot program for skilled nursing facilities and nursing facilities (Section 1422, p. 607)
28. Demonstration program for approved teaching health centers with respect to Medicare GME (Section 1502(d), p. 674)
29. Pilot program to develop anti-fraud compliance systems for Medicare providers (Section 1635, p. 716)
30. Medical home pilot program under Medicaid (Section 1722, p. 780)
31. Comparative Effectiveness Research Trust Fund (Section 1802, p. 824)
32. “Identifiable office or program” within CMS to “provide for improved coordination between Medicare and Medicaid in the case of dual eligibles” (Section 1905, p. 852)
33. Public Health Investment Fund (Section 2002, p. 859)
34. Scholarships for service in health professional needs areas (Section 2211, p. 870)
35. Loan repayment program for service in health professional needs areas (Section 2211, p. 873)
36. Program for training medical residents in community-based settings (Section 2214, p. 882)
37. Grant program for training in dentistry programs (Section 2215, p. 887)
38. Public Health Workforce Corps (Section 2231, p. 898)
39. Public health workforce scholarship program (Section 2231, p. 900)
40. Public health workforce loan forgiveness program (Section 2231, p. 904)
41. Grant program for innovations in interdisciplinary care (Section 2252, p 917)
42. Advisory Committee on Health Workforce Evaluation and Assessment (Section 2261, p. 920)
43. Prevention and Wellness Trust (Section 2301, p. 932)
44. Clinical Prevention Stakeholders Board (Section 2301, p. 941)
45. Community Prevention Stakeholders Board (Section 2301, p. 947)
46. Grant program for community prevention and wellness research (Section 2301, p. 950)
47. Grant program for community prevention and wellness services (Section 2301, p. 951)
48. Grant program for public health infrastructure (Section 2301, p. 955)
49. Center for Quality Improvement (Section 2401, p. 965)
50. Assistant Secretary for Health Information (Section 2402, p. 972)
51. Grant program to support the operation of school-based health clinics (Section 2511, p. 993)
52. National Medical Device Registry (Section 2521, p. 1001)
53. Grants for labor-management programs for nursing training (Section 2531, p. 1008)

This is how Washington works. For now. Read the titles of these new revenue black holes. Insanity.

Health care by bureaucrats. What could go wrong?

(H.T. The Daley Gator.)

Dodger Pitcher Hiroki Kuroda Released from Hospital

After being beaned by a line drive during a game against the Arizona Diamondbacks, Dodger pitcher, Hiroki Kurodo was released from the hospital and allowed to return to Los Angeles.

Here's a video showing various angles of the play. Note that the ball hit him so solidly that it almost made the stands between the 3rd base dugout and home plate on the fly, but short-hopped instead for a ground rule double.



I will now always consider him Iron Head Kuroda. That boy sure can take a punch.

There IS Honor Among Thieves

Two burglars pillage a home, find a laptop with child pornography, turn it over to the police, and take their own medicine.

The owner also got 3-1/2 years.

(H.T. FARK.com.)

In an unrelated crime story... Here in Janesville an attempted robbery is caught on surveillance video inside a local bar. The masked bandito didn't realize that his finger in his pocket was little deterrent to the group of off-duty cops that were enjoying some R&R. (Please note the one cop didn't even set down his beer during the apprehension.)

John Kerry- Progressive Pioneer

While I have never been a fan of macro-evolution; a cow turning into a whale, a reptile turning into a bird, or a rat to a man, new evidence has come to light that may cause me to change my thinking.

We all remember the hoots that were had when Senator John Kerry voted for it before he voted against it. Poor Senator Kerry, he was just ahead of his time. But, like most pioneers, he had to take the arrows for the benefit of others to follow.

He evolved.

Now that the pioneer came and conquered, the settlers may enter in safety.

Ezekiel Emanuel preached withholding of care to useless eaters.

He evolved.

Nancy Pelosi was a big fan of town hall disrupters in 2006.

She evolved.

John Kerry was just ahead of his time, but his ability to evolve from a cow to a beached whale was proved by his electoral success. Emanuel and Pelosi are able to use Kerry's victory as a stepping stone to achieve their own successes. Emanuel evolved from a Neanderthal to a rat; Pelosi from a bird to a reptile.

Let us hope that Pelosi and Emanuel are able to succeed in like manner as Kerry.

The Art of Gentle Persuasion

"Dream it with me or be a punk."

TrogloPundit Undergoes Death Panel Counseling

The TrogloPundit, otherwise known to surface dwellers as the mild-mannered Lance Burri, recently went to the doctor for a routine check up. As Lance is getting a little long in the tooth, he was required to see the region's Death Panel Counselor to receive End of Life information.

"Mr. Lance Burri, it says here that you have had chronic complains of bunions and hangnails. Hmmmm... (It also says that you have been flagged by the White House as a fishy conservative Republican right-wing blogger.) I am directed by your government to counsel you about end of life issues and cost overruns. My calculations show that the treatment costs for your chronic ailments have far exceeded your value to the present administration. Further expenses for medical care have been denied. However, we are not without compassion and wish to make your final three hours as pleasant as possible."

"Your records tell us your weight and favorite drink. Our medical scientists, all top men trained by Ezekiel Emanuel, have ascribed the dosage of your prescription."

"Here, go fill this scrip out at Joe's Government Bar & Pharmacy."

"Have a nice day."

Lunch Reform Initiative

(H.T. Dr. John Ray.)

Democrats' Panties in a Bunch

This picture (stolen from Liberty Belle) is just begging for a caption.

It's the only pair we could find big enough to handle the Obama Administration's skid marks.

Is Maureen Dowd an Arab Plant?

I am not a doctor although I could play one at a town hall meeting. So while reading this technical article over on The Other McCain I had a great deal of trouble understanding the medical terminology.

With Dorland's Medical Dictionary at my side, I endeavored to persevere and understand the important information that the article conveyed. To the best of my knowledge Dr. McCain was diagnosing and explaining the prognosis of Maureen Dowd's camel toe gone awandering in a desert.

I didn't even know that Maureen Dowd was Arab, but I think the astute Dr. McCain prescribed a closet full of burqas and complete silence while MoDo actually listened to what someone else had to say.

I could easily be wrong in my interpretation of the science involved but my intuition says, "Eureka! By Jove, I think he's got it!"

Democrat Party to Change Name to Deflect Bad Public Image

The Democrat Party has recycled the same old ideas since the 1960's. They often have to repackage these deep thoughts with new terminology and fresh sound bites to keep them palatable to the American public. When the term 'liberal' came into disfavor, they morphed into 'progressives.'

Today, as the polls indicate that the Democrat Party is going over like a lead balloon, the party think tank, headed by Howard Dean, decided to change the party name. After consulting with Vice President Joe Biden, Dean announced that the new party moniker will now be 'The Donner Party.'

The Democrats Got Me Pegged

I am certified Fishy by TellUsAboutPeopleWhoSayStuffWeDon'tLike@Whitehouse.gov. Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid labels me an Evil-Monger. They are perceptive observations. I confess that I am An Evil Fishmonger:

Evil FishMonger

Please Show Your Work

In an article on Townhall.com titled Kathleen Parker, the Barry Lynn of the South, Ann Coulter makes the following statement:

How one gets from "we don't want socialized medicine" to "we hate black people" was a tough equation. As my algebra teacher used to say: "Please show your work."

It's true because I feel strongly that it is true. Don't try to force that racist-sexist-homophobic-xenophobic oppressive white male constructed logic and rational narrative down my throat!

Death Panels

Alaska Senator Lisa Murkowski criticizes critics of ObamaCare:

U.S. Sen. Lisa Murkowski on Tuesday told an Anchorage crowd that critics of health care reform, the summer's hottest political topic, aren't helping the debate by throwing out highly charged assertions not based in fact.

"It does us no good to incite fear in people by saying that there's these end-of-life provisions, these death panels," Murkowski, a Republican, said. "Quite honestly, I'm so offended at that terminology because it absolutely isn't (in the bill). There is no reason to gin up fear in the American public by saying things that are not included in the bill."

Ordinarily I would agree with Senator Murkowski's statements, but the context changes normal rules of logic. The context is the federal government operating in the liberal mode.

Pundette sums it up well:

And if the Dems pass some watered-down version they'll make sure that it morphs into a monster over time.

"Mighty oaks from tiny acorns grow."

Regardless of the specific language, one can better judge the scope of legislation from the history of the genre. Federal income tax legislation began as 1%-7% tax on income. Social security started at 2% of the first $3,000 of income, but like Medicare and Medicaid morphed into a pyramid scheme. SCHIP was expanded to cover far beyond the scope of its original language. The Fourteenth Amendment's due process clause morphed into the right to privacy and therefore right to abort one's own child.

So, while it is true that pending legislation in ObamaCare doesn't specifically name death panels, history legitimizes any concern that it is genetically within H.R. 3200's acorn.

Terminological Clarification

Technical Vernacular

There has been a great amount of discussion, debate, argument , and protest concerning Democrat controlled Congress and White House promotion of health care reform. The bill generally in question is the one ready for floor vote in the House of Representatives. It is numbered H.R. 3200 and is sponsored by Rep. John Dingell of Michigan. This is apparently also the bill which President Obama is promoting.

Since this bill is sponsored by Dingell and its greatest backer is President Obama, I will strive for clarity when speaking of it. From now on this legislation will be referred to as 'The Dingell-Barry Bill.' This should help avoid any confusion as to the subject under discussion.

Why SEIU Thugs Must Be Hired for the Town Hall Meetings

The President's calls to regular ObamaCare supporters produced these volunteers:

(H.T. TigerHawk.)

Ve Have Our Vays, Comrade

Ze People's Cube Strikes Again:

"Oh, wow, man, he put that cigarette out in his eye, man!"*
*Extra credit for identifying quote reference.

(H.T. Donald Douglas.)

Democrats Use Mimes to Translate ObamaCare

Ling and Marie over on Interesting News Items always put up some great stuff.

Here's another great example:

Mimes Explain Obamacare

WASHINGTON, DC - Fearful of angry constituent questions, Democratic congressmen have hired mimes to attend townhall meetings and "act out" the healthcare bill. Said Democratic Party spokesperson Tara Pung: "By using gestures and cuteness, the mimes will hopefully diffuse anger and cause people to laugh at their own foibles, rather than focus on a giant, unread plan to take-over the nation's health care."...

...Constituents beat the mime with a folding chair.

...He was struck with the card catalog.

"Speaker Pelosi assures me we have sufficient mimes to get through August...

On deck- Parrots.

Thomas Jefferson, Sit Down and Shut Up

I don't want you folks who created this capitalist mess to do a lot of talking. I want you just to get out of the way so we can remake this country in our image.



(H.T. Ol' Broad.)

The World Follows Obama's Lead

From Don Surber's Daily Scoreboard:

Speaking of political show trials, Iran is putting its protesters on trial. Apparently a lot of suspicious behavior was reported to fishy@ayatollah.gov.

"The Smallest Feline is a Masterpiece"

"Hey, Kittyanna Katrina Kalikovsky Mayovich, why don't you play the piano like that?"

"Yo, Bozo, for one, we don't have a piano. For two, what do you think I am- some kind of liberal pussy? Now get outta here. You're scaring away all the verminous (but tasty) little critters."

(H.T. Snaggletoothie of the Loyal Opposition.)